feeling close to someone is less a function of distance
and much more one of connection
try it imagine you
and they were
together
now
x
a story
one
x
Tuesday 31 December 2013
fuck off and die or live the choice is yours
i wont compete
the reason why i wont compete anymore
wont fight unless in self defences no more
is cos something, ok dancing, listening to a
rythymic beat has put inside my mind body
something of a prancing prattling nature one
more time again, poetry isnt any good to me
if it doesnt rhyme and as much as i would like
to write without everything coming out prose
or prosey or a posey of words i dont know it's
taken me over this need to express something
i dont know what it is, it's something amazing so
nice and lovely the way it feels to feel again more
than that its living and loving life and death again
for they are the two impostors not triumpth and
defeat
x
the love of friendship seems so much better than
fighting for something someone when it shouldn't
come to that i dont believe in that never did don't
wish to fight or lose myself in the struggle to better
someone else to be better than them when i know
that im better than anyone else simply because i don't care if i am or not
really i fucking couldn't give a shit who is a better football team who is the
best at anything im certainly not its just this rampant desire to open my
mouth and speak even though in person thats the toughest thing i ever
felt like doing, when i was young talking wasnt didnt seem much fun i
preferred to avoid conversation because it seemed like a fight once more
like a battle of wills to see who is right or wrong rather than what is
and that is the crux, im not mulling things over so much as letting
my head do that and my heart and gut and cock not so much
i dont believe in thinking with that or lusting after something
that isnt an object anymore but a subject, we are all subjects
not of a queen on earth unless its nature and to her i hope
we mean more than life itself because she keeps on creating
things that live and then die and the ones that make sense
the ones that survive that pass on something of worth
she keeps going into the future for someone unknown
fucking reason which i can only guess at might be
might mean something more than the struggle
x
the reason why i wont compete anymore
wont fight unless in self defences no more
is cos something, ok dancing, listening to a
rythymic beat has put inside my mind body
something of a prancing prattling nature one
more time again, poetry isnt any good to me
if it doesnt rhyme and as much as i would like
to write without everything coming out prose
or prosey or a posey of words i dont know it's
taken me over this need to express something
i dont know what it is, it's something amazing so
nice and lovely the way it feels to feel again more
than that its living and loving life and death again
for they are the two impostors not triumpth and
defeat
x
the love of friendship seems so much better than
fighting for something someone when it shouldn't
come to that i dont believe in that never did don't
wish to fight or lose myself in the struggle to better
someone else to be better than them when i know
that im better than anyone else simply because i don't care if i am or not
really i fucking couldn't give a shit who is a better football team who is the
best at anything im certainly not its just this rampant desire to open my
mouth and speak even though in person thats the toughest thing i ever
felt like doing, when i was young talking wasnt didnt seem much fun i
preferred to avoid conversation because it seemed like a fight once more
like a battle of wills to see who is right or wrong rather than what is
and that is the crux, im not mulling things over so much as letting
my head do that and my heart and gut and cock not so much
i dont believe in thinking with that or lusting after something
that isnt an object anymore but a subject, we are all subjects
not of a queen on earth unless its nature and to her i hope
we mean more than life itself because she keeps on creating
things that live and then die and the ones that make sense
the ones that survive that pass on something of worth
she keeps going into the future for someone unknown
fucking reason which i can only guess at might be
might mean something more than the struggle
x
Monday 30 December 2013
the world i came from to come to this exists outside of time, a state of bliss
the world i came from to come to this
exists outside of time, a state of bliss.
you see in nature as much as the silverback roars and beats his chest
power and control are illusions, it's the feminine that rules the roosts,
they give life more than the men do, so whatever they say goes given
that they have a much closer connection to the source of it all usually
obviously there are exceptions and the rules round here are generally
supposedly god given but in reality the laws are made by and upheld
by men, in the positions they refer to as power, another big mistake.
sex for instance, in this world it has degenerated along with most of
us into a situation where if the common assumption is to be believed
what generally happens these days is people go out get fucked off of
their heads then do things they would much rather do with someone
they loved if they could only listen to or speak of their hearts desires
for me that kind of connection is reserved, has become so, recently
and over the period of abstinence, celibacy, and down right disgust
with myself for hurting someone i loved dearly, who needed to hit
rock bottom on their own, in order to build themselves back again
up from there, it's become what it once was, a spiritual thing not
something you give away, or as it seems to me these days just
a way for a man to wank himself off inside somebody's warm
body or for a woman to get what she feels she deserves not
to be honoured or joined in love but to be treated like less
than she feels inside, as a whore, because sex sells and
if she gives it away maybe one day that man will love
her for who she is not what she gives so readily...
so am i insane or as that lad in the pub said,
making it very unlikely that any woman
would want a bar of me or summat
like that, along those lines, given
all the crap i went through this
summer and unashamedly
posted on here, now to
my shame, i admit
i feel bad, for
saying it all
though
now
x
exists outside of time, a state of bliss.
you see in nature as much as the silverback roars and beats his chest
power and control are illusions, it's the feminine that rules the roosts,
they give life more than the men do, so whatever they say goes given
that they have a much closer connection to the source of it all usually
obviously there are exceptions and the rules round here are generally
supposedly god given but in reality the laws are made by and upheld
by men, in the positions they refer to as power, another big mistake.
sex for instance, in this world it has degenerated along with most of
us into a situation where if the common assumption is to be believed
what generally happens these days is people go out get fucked off of
their heads then do things they would much rather do with someone
they loved if they could only listen to or speak of their hearts desires
for me that kind of connection is reserved, has become so, recently
and over the period of abstinence, celibacy, and down right disgust
with myself for hurting someone i loved dearly, who needed to hit
rock bottom on their own, in order to build themselves back again
up from there, it's become what it once was, a spiritual thing not
something you give away, or as it seems to me these days just
a way for a man to wank himself off inside somebody's warm
body or for a woman to get what she feels she deserves not
to be honoured or joined in love but to be treated like less
than she feels inside, as a whore, because sex sells and
if she gives it away maybe one day that man will love
her for who she is not what she gives so readily...
so am i insane or as that lad in the pub said,
making it very unlikely that any woman
would want a bar of me or summat
like that, along those lines, given
all the crap i went through this
summer and unashamedly
posted on here, now to
my shame, i admit
i feel bad, for
saying it all
though
now
x
catheartic
a while back i was chatting with a lad who years before had died
was sitting in one of two slightly rocking arm chairs in a caravan
he had owned and spent time in with his friends in which i reside
i got the feeling i wasn't alone and turned as if to say hello there
then we started the conversation between us in our conciousness
he wished for me to pass on to his best friend the fears and love
that he had felt on the tragic day that he had passed from this life
and so i did just that and scared as i was knew it was right to do
now this all sounds crazy and even to me then and now it seems
not to make any sense in this modern world where such things of
seeming superstition make some nervous and others feel a love
they thought was lost forever and a day or 'til their last one lived
brings with it the promise of another unending day of the truest
expression of who we are, why we are here, what this place is...
was sitting in one of two slightly rocking arm chairs in a caravan
he had owned and spent time in with his friends in which i reside
i got the feeling i wasn't alone and turned as if to say hello there
then we started the conversation between us in our conciousness
he wished for me to pass on to his best friend the fears and love
that he had felt on the tragic day that he had passed from this life
and so i did just that and scared as i was knew it was right to do
now this all sounds crazy and even to me then and now it seems
not to make any sense in this modern world where such things of
seeming superstition make some nervous and others feel a love
they thought was lost forever and a day or 'til their last one lived
brings with it the promise of another unending day of the truest
expression of who we are, why we are here, what this place is...
Sunday 29 December 2013
im scared to love
listing things that made me question all, then believe in more.
swirly whirly white energy thingy on a photo i took at avebury
strange coincidences that felt like much more, synchronicities
feeling the presence of divinity while alone on a mountain top
meeting people once i pushed through my fear of dying alone
tapped someone on a shoulder psychically them feeling it too
meeting people that said strange things that felt true to them
knowing that others could accept me for who i really am wtf?
got some kind of fluey lurgy thing at the moment yuck cough
my priorities have changed from merely surviving to thriving
all of the above and so many more things have happened so
i know there is more to life than whining, women and songs
as scared as i am right now to push on through, go forward
there's no going back as comforting as the old certainty was
i'm uncertain about almost everything, confused all the time
like a dog shaking because you're trying to change it's ways
this isn't easy and i get the feeling i've failed before aplenty
what i've been told about my palms where there's crosses
suggests i've been around the block circled the mortal coil
many times before and been burnt at the stake, as a here
tic as a true believer in a world of lies and false flag fakes
that's how i feel about times gone by a cathar, montsegur
avebury, these places called and continue to speak to me
trying to get through to someone who wasn't listening up
im listening and learning finally and my old instincts keep
making me want to curl up and die rather than keep on,
making the same mistakes again how do i know which
way to turn? All i know is i've met some people i love
and all i can do from now on is commit to learning
and loving them not for who they are but what
they represent, they represent a divine love
that i am still skeptical of because of my
fear
x
swirly whirly white energy thingy on a photo i took at avebury
strange coincidences that felt like much more, synchronicities
feeling the presence of divinity while alone on a mountain top
meeting people once i pushed through my fear of dying alone
tapped someone on a shoulder psychically them feeling it too
meeting people that said strange things that felt true to them
knowing that others could accept me for who i really am wtf?
got some kind of fluey lurgy thing at the moment yuck cough
my priorities have changed from merely surviving to thriving
all of the above and so many more things have happened so
i know there is more to life than whining, women and songs
as scared as i am right now to push on through, go forward
there's no going back as comforting as the old certainty was
i'm uncertain about almost everything, confused all the time
like a dog shaking because you're trying to change it's ways
this isn't easy and i get the feeling i've failed before aplenty
what i've been told about my palms where there's crosses
suggests i've been around the block circled the mortal coil
many times before and been burnt at the stake, as a here
tic as a true believer in a world of lies and false flag fakes
that's how i feel about times gone by a cathar, montsegur
avebury, these places called and continue to speak to me
trying to get through to someone who wasn't listening up
im listening and learning finally and my old instincts keep
making me want to curl up and die rather than keep on,
making the same mistakes again how do i know which
way to turn? All i know is i've met some people i love
and all i can do from now on is commit to learning
and loving them not for who they are but what
they represent, they represent a divine love
that i am still skeptical of because of my
fear
x
a beacon of hope
"No.
You see children know such a lot now, they soon don't believe in
fairies, and every time a child says, 'I don't believe in fairies,'
there is a fairy somewhere that falls down dead."
In my heart and rarely spoken of was always the belief in more, that we should be, could be more than we are, more to life than this... So i embarked on a journey to find out the truth and now i'm more confused than ever, and facing my own self loathing find it's just that, as much as i took onboard all the horrible things people said about me and ran with them... It was just that, my own self loathing, my own desire not to disappoint myself by trying, by ever entertaining the belief that i deserved better.
I strove to find a source of information that I could trust
now i'm just hanging on for dear life whilst balance, or normal service, is restored and the tidal wave of emotions that i hadn't felt because I was meant to be strong for others washes over me along with all the lies
It ain't easy but it feels right and now when i'm with those in my life
who most honestly represent what i feel to be true
that's the only time i feel like myself
I was thinking, dreaming, envisioning a way for me to contribute
had all these plans to try to create an intentional community
close to home so i could be close to home out of some frankly selfish desire for things to stay the same, for me not to have to say goodbye to an old life
truth be told, that'll never work and so i'm looking for like minded souls
have found some i believe, and losing my need for perfection
it seems like i will have to cast off and leave home
to be a part of something, be bold, go
walk out with some debts to repay
be useful, transcend, work hard
i hope it's the right choice
i could never decide
was a dreamer
now i know
the truth
and it's
love
x
In my heart and rarely spoken of was always the belief in more, that we should be, could be more than we are, more to life than this... So i embarked on a journey to find out the truth and now i'm more confused than ever, and facing my own self loathing find it's just that, as much as i took onboard all the horrible things people said about me and ran with them... It was just that, my own self loathing, my own desire not to disappoint myself by trying, by ever entertaining the belief that i deserved better.
I strove to find a source of information that I could trust
now i'm just hanging on for dear life whilst balance, or normal service, is restored and the tidal wave of emotions that i hadn't felt because I was meant to be strong for others washes over me along with all the lies
It ain't easy but it feels right and now when i'm with those in my life
who most honestly represent what i feel to be true
that's the only time i feel like myself
I was thinking, dreaming, envisioning a way for me to contribute
had all these plans to try to create an intentional community
close to home so i could be close to home out of some frankly selfish desire for things to stay the same, for me not to have to say goodbye to an old life
truth be told, that'll never work and so i'm looking for like minded souls
have found some i believe, and losing my need for perfection
it seems like i will have to cast off and leave home
to be a part of something, be bold, go
walk out with some debts to repay
be useful, transcend, work hard
i hope it's the right choice
i could never decide
was a dreamer
now i know
the truth
and it's
love
x
Friday 27 December 2013
i only know the answers for others not me
if you suffer from acute or chronic pain a solution can present itself
you can enter into a dialogue with your pain, talk to your body...
if it's emotional turmoil, physical pain or spiritual confusion
you don't know who to turn to, you could always try me
or ask yourself the question why? what does it mean?
you need to imagine that things can get better,
not false hope, be realistic, no dream too big
but have hope that things can get better
give yourself a chance to recover or
to find a way through your pain
i asked for guidance, what's
my next step, i need help
the answer came as it
usually does in the
form of what i
already knew
get a higher
perspective
dumbass ;)
love from
above
<3 font="">
x
p.s. i dont claim to have all the answers, but when it's someone elses problem, they just seem to present themselves to me, just pretend that tomorrow things could be a little better, and the next day, and have faith in yourself again x i dont often ask for things for myself things have to get very bad ;)
you can enter into a dialogue with your pain, talk to your body...
if it's emotional turmoil, physical pain or spiritual confusion
you don't know who to turn to, you could always try me
or ask yourself the question why? what does it mean?
you need to imagine that things can get better,
not false hope, be realistic, no dream too big
but have hope that things can get better
give yourself a chance to recover or
to find a way through your pain
i asked for guidance, what's
my next step, i need help
the answer came as it
usually does in the
form of what i
already knew
get a higher
perspective
dumbass ;)
love from
above
<3 font="">
x
p.s. i dont claim to have all the answers, but when it's someone elses problem, they just seem to present themselves to me, just pretend that tomorrow things could be a little better, and the next day, and have faith in yourself again x i dont often ask for things for myself things have to get very bad ;)
Thursday 26 December 2013
trust noone? i trust someone
i don't usually go to people as my first point of contact when i'm hurting
i walk out into the woods and i scream and shout and cry or just walk
and talk it out with mother nature, get it off my chest, she listens
i just rant and rave and dance and sing and soon everything
is gone and done and dusted and i am free again so...
i'm sorry if i dont get in touch much you see
often i would prefer to lumber someone
i trust and i dont trust many folks
ive learnt from experience
you cant be trusted
you lie and fake
everything
get real
please
love
jon
x
i walk out into the woods and i scream and shout and cry or just walk
and talk it out with mother nature, get it off my chest, she listens
i just rant and rave and dance and sing and soon everything
is gone and done and dusted and i am free again so...
i'm sorry if i dont get in touch much you see
often i would prefer to lumber someone
i trust and i dont trust many folks
ive learnt from experience
you cant be trusted
you lie and fake
everything
get real
please
love
jon
x
Wednesday 25 December 2013
reconnection
saw my first love the other day, the first person
i loved that loved me, other than my family
in my minds eye i saw her face smiling
laughing, quite unlike the fading
faces and memories of the
past this seemed more
like a reconnection
a celebration
of love
x
i loved that loved me, other than my family
in my minds eye i saw her face smiling
laughing, quite unlike the fading
faces and memories of the
past this seemed more
like a reconnection
a celebration
of love
x
Tuesday 24 December 2013
while i was awake
while i was sleeping
i was unconscious,
deliberately, with
drink and drugs
cos that's less
painful than
feeling so
a wake
end
of
a
reality that everyone else denies exists or doesn't speak of or ridicules
because to believe that it could be true would be too good surely
don't call me shirley although i am a woman more than a
man just yet but that suits me fine until im alone
with a woman of my dreams im not
in any hurry murray mints
for fresh breath
nice to be
nice
x
i was unconscious,
deliberately, with
drink and drugs
cos that's less
painful than
feeling so
a wake
end
of
a
reality that everyone else denies exists or doesn't speak of or ridicules
because to believe that it could be true would be too good surely
don't call me shirley although i am a woman more than a
man just yet but that suits me fine until im alone
with a woman of my dreams im not
in any hurry murray mints
for fresh breath
nice to be
nice
x
loving you while you were sleeping... now thats a porn niche i havent heard of in a while
While you were sleeping, i took your pain
took away cancerous thoughts, emotions
I hope you don't mind doubting Thomas
but in the end we shall see who knows
you may be in remission from disease
feelings ill at ease was the issue 1st.
anxiousness nervousness stress less
i've suffered to connect to you to see
for myself in my minds eye and heart
to draw it out with my right renergisin
with my left hand giving taking loving u
feel what and how much you've suffered
to enable me to feel the same way body &
mind and soul and spirit, my head hurt badly
but that was then and this is now i took a virus
from your programming and cleaned it with my
rather rediculously perfect problem solving p.c.
my personal computer has been co-creating an
learning from the great computer in the sky so
you could say i've been watching you watching
me watching them watching always taking it in
seeing where the little loop holes are in reality
they are many we are them, we loop habits so
that we can feel comfortable with the certainty
in true reality we need to feel constantly atotal
insecurity, fragility, openess, truly, uncertainty.
Striking back with love that when is threatened
Loving you is easy cos your beautiful la la la lal
lalalalalalalalalalaaaaallllll
laughing a lot
no matter
this is
not
x
took away cancerous thoughts, emotions
I hope you don't mind doubting Thomas
but in the end we shall see who knows
you may be in remission from disease
feelings ill at ease was the issue 1st.
anxiousness nervousness stress less
i've suffered to connect to you to see
for myself in my minds eye and heart
to draw it out with my right renergisin
with my left hand giving taking loving u
feel what and how much you've suffered
to enable me to feel the same way body &
mind and soul and spirit, my head hurt badly
but that was then and this is now i took a virus
from your programming and cleaned it with my
rather rediculously perfect problem solving p.c.
my personal computer has been co-creating an
learning from the great computer in the sky so
you could say i've been watching you watching
me watching them watching always taking it in
seeing where the little loop holes are in reality
they are many we are them, we loop habits so
that we can feel comfortable with the certainty
in true reality we need to feel constantly atotal
insecurity, fragility, openess, truly, uncertainty.
Striking back with love that when is threatened
Loving you is easy cos your beautiful la la la lal
lalalalalalalalalalaaaaallllll
laughing a lot
no matter
this is
not
x
Monday 23 December 2013
gods gift to goddesses i certainly am not
yet
i never look anything in the mouth, usually i like to look into the eyes of whom im speaking to.
gift horses or otherwise it's only recently that ive started to look at people in any other way,
than as just that
people
x
anyway you're all god gift to herself itself
children of a higher love
i never look anything in the mouth, usually i like to look into the eyes of whom im speaking to.
gift horses or otherwise it's only recently that ive started to look at people in any other way,
than as just that
people
x
anyway you're all god gift to herself itself
children of a higher love
Friday 20 December 2013
a gnostic agnostic
i was raised to believe whatever i liked
went to a c of e primary school then to
comprehensive without hymns / prayer
always felt, i was an 'agnostic' though,
i don't know all the words to the songs
no matter now that i'm a gnostic some
one who has a body of knowledge and
i don't have a soul, i am a soul, having
a body for a limited period called life...
accepting that death is inevitable when
this life ends does not remove a need
to feel like ya know what is going on
now and what will go on when it's
all over, it tells me to live every
day as if it was my last and
from now on i hope to
do just that without
fear of failure or
depression or
repression
there's
only
<3 br="">
went to a c of e primary school then to
comprehensive without hymns / prayer
always felt, i was an 'agnostic' though,
i don't know all the words to the songs
no matter now that i'm a gnostic some
one who has a body of knowledge and
i don't have a soul, i am a soul, having
a body for a limited period called life...
accepting that death is inevitable when
this life ends does not remove a need
to feel like ya know what is going on
now and what will go on when it's
all over, it tells me to live every
day as if it was my last and
from now on i hope to
do just that without
fear of failure or
depression or
repression
there's
only
<3 br="">
speak to me now
living a human life gives us the idea that time goes forwards
not backwards so we tend to assume that's how it works
imagine if you will however that our future selves can
talk to us, send us messages, speak from far off
into the world we live in today and that they
wish for us to have what dreams may
come, come true collectively not
just our own because I can
tell you that is how it
works in heaven
and on earth
as it is
now
x
not backwards so we tend to assume that's how it works
imagine if you will however that our future selves can
talk to us, send us messages, speak from far off
into the world we live in today and that they
wish for us to have what dreams may
come, come true collectively not
just our own because I can
tell you that is how it
works in heaven
and on earth
as it is
now
x
Thursday 19 December 2013
heretic here is a tic on your souls and lifeblood
Reading between the Lions
One of the things that i take issue with the Christian church is the notion that God was a male single parent, who impregnated a married woman
everyone knows that behind a great man there is surely a great woman
at least, it would make no sense for god not to have a female counter-
part, counterpoint. After all where in nature is there no female for the
male to chase down, or romance, or otherwise impress and to honour?
It makes NO SENSE at all, in the light of the modern day to say so or to
believe in such a fallacy... THE ONLY REASON to suggest a royal family
in heaven, father son and holy ghost whose gender is never mentioned
is if you wish to suggest and legitimise royal families as the way it must
be on earth as it is in heaven... This is plainly and clearly bastardisation
As for Jesus of Nazareth, he became christ, he became enlightened
through the struggles of his life that we are not privy to because
those years are lost to history, a word that comes as Sister
Wendy Beckett explains in her book the story of painting
by way of latin, from the greek work historien, 'to
narrate' coming from another greek word
histor "a judge" so his story, written
by mostly men is a judgement
on those now long since
dead by those who
lived on after to
provide us with
a way forward
based on what
came before
What will the legends of this time say of the people of this time?
As sister Wendy suggests 'We must forget the densities of
"History" and simply surrender to the wonder of the
story... The story is unbalanced because the
church leaders wished to control a pop-
ulace, a people hell bent, on gaining
their freedom from the oppression
of overlords of gods of monsters
of royal persons who claim to
be the sole representation
on earth of a heavenly
family. That is wrong
You are just as much
a prince or princess
a child of god and
not less than the
angels but much
more and just
as worthy as
a man called
jesus if you
wish, strive
to be so
the lamb will lay down with the lions
but only when the lions, are brought
down to our level so that all are one
In the eyes of a great goodness that
we can call a god, or a goddess are
the truth way and light of the world
seen when we become enlightened
ourselves through the journeys we
can all take to recover our spiritual
her-itage from the male dominated
his stories we have been force fed
One of the things that i take issue with the Christian church is the notion that God was a male single parent, who impregnated a married woman
everyone knows that behind a great man there is surely a great woman
at least, it would make no sense for god not to have a female counter-
part, counterpoint. After all where in nature is there no female for the
male to chase down, or romance, or otherwise impress and to honour?
It makes NO SENSE at all, in the light of the modern day to say so or to
believe in such a fallacy... THE ONLY REASON to suggest a royal family
in heaven, father son and holy ghost whose gender is never mentioned
is if you wish to suggest and legitimise royal families as the way it must
be on earth as it is in heaven... This is plainly and clearly bastardisation
As for Jesus of Nazareth, he became christ, he became enlightened
through the struggles of his life that we are not privy to because
those years are lost to history, a word that comes as Sister
Wendy Beckett explains in her book the story of painting
by way of latin, from the greek work historien, 'to
narrate' coming from another greek word
histor "a judge" so his story, written
by mostly men is a judgement
on those now long since
dead by those who
lived on after to
provide us with
a way forward
based on what
came before
What will the legends of this time say of the people of this time?
As sister Wendy suggests 'We must forget the densities of
"History" and simply surrender to the wonder of the
story... The story is unbalanced because the
church leaders wished to control a pop-
ulace, a people hell bent, on gaining
their freedom from the oppression
of overlords of gods of monsters
of royal persons who claim to
be the sole representation
on earth of a heavenly
family. That is wrong
You are just as much
a prince or princess
a child of god and
not less than the
angels but much
more and just
as worthy as
a man called
jesus if you
wish, strive
to be so
the lamb will lay down with the lions
but only when the lions, are brought
down to our level so that all are one
In the eyes of a great goodness that
we can call a god, or a goddess are
the truth way and light of the world
seen when we become enlightened
ourselves through the journeys we
can all take to recover our spiritual
her-itage from the male dominated
his stories we have been force fed
Tuesday 17 December 2013
i heart you
whenever, wherever you feel pain inside
send it to your heart breath it into there
let your heart, an amazingly powerful
healer take your pain and transmute
it into joy and feeling so good for
no apparent reason most if not
all of the time that you have
no reason or need to find
out why it's
just so
lush
x
send it to your heart breath it into there
let your heart, an amazingly powerful
healer take your pain and transmute
it into joy and feeling so good for
no apparent reason most if not
all of the time that you have
no reason or need to find
out why it's
just so
lush
x
bardic(k) love poetry
a hero terence mckenna may have been a shill for the c.i.a. afterall
i don't doubt his veracity though so along with other doubts ill let go
we don't have the truth about so many things, a spiritual experience
with true passion and fire inside burning up an old you reborn anew
perturbing your conciousness to the extent, with the intent and love
with the honest internal desire to know what is really going on why
we are here, all the big questions answered and then taken away
because you're supposed to get there more slowly, over time in
some ways a trip is just that, your life condensed into moments
minutes, hours, days of your life, your lifetime, a mere instant
of tripping balls and then you work hard, find out where to go
next, how to do it right, longer, harder, faster, better until...
Your waking life, terence said it would be oh so horrible,
terrible to be tripping without having taken something
but perturbing your conciousness, your safe haven
in your head and body and soul the right ways
merges the psychedelic trip with your life
with your lifetime so that it can be trippy
all the time in a good way, spread out
comfortably over the course of your
fate which by the way is a path on
one side or the other of destiny
which you are in line with
when you merge those
two realities into
one truly
won
x
i don't doubt his veracity though so along with other doubts ill let go
we don't have the truth about so many things, a spiritual experience
with true passion and fire inside burning up an old you reborn anew
perturbing your conciousness to the extent, with the intent and love
with the honest internal desire to know what is really going on why
we are here, all the big questions answered and then taken away
because you're supposed to get there more slowly, over time in
some ways a trip is just that, your life condensed into moments
minutes, hours, days of your life, your lifetime, a mere instant
of tripping balls and then you work hard, find out where to go
next, how to do it right, longer, harder, faster, better until...
Your waking life, terence said it would be oh so horrible,
terrible to be tripping without having taken something
but perturbing your conciousness, your safe haven
in your head and body and soul the right ways
merges the psychedelic trip with your life
with your lifetime so that it can be trippy
all the time in a good way, spread out
comfortably over the course of your
fate which by the way is a path on
one side or the other of destiny
which you are in line with
when you merge those
two realities into
one truly
won
x
Monday 16 December 2013
grey rain curtain
all of us are very lucky to be here, having won a 6 billion to one lottery
to be conceived in the first place, then surviving all sorts of illnesses,
disease and tragedy. I myself nearly died when i was born and again
a couple of years ago, not knowing at the time quite how close I came,
the journeys i have undertaken showed me not to fear dying and that
'Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey
rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass,
and then you see it.' So i don't fear death, dying painfully yes ;)
This informed me that there is so much more to life
An energy that we can summon from outside of us
A feeling within that resonates with those energies
The ability to meditate and feel your own life-force
The ancient tales and legends and myths spoke of
a truth that has been denied and corrupted many
times over the years since we lost our spiritual
heart and were given to believe that we need
others as our intermediaries to speak to 'god'
We look down on tribes people who claim to
have a tradition that can work wonders and
yes miracles and slowly our male dominant
hierarchy spoiled those tribal healers ability
they undermined the way of life suggesting
that men should be the religious leaders...
The western world goes around saying we will bring you freedom and democracy and in the next breath talks of 'Capturing Hearts & Minds'
We don't have it right any more than the communists did and yet we've been patting ourselves on the back ever since the fall of the berlin wall
Our economic system is a misnomer, because it is not sustainable
it is not economic except with the truth and that is that the planet
is dying and us with it unless or until we free ourselves from the
doctrine and dogma of churches and business leaders who say
profit and greed are good, keep filling our coffers and one day
we will resolve all of the worlds problems, yet they get worse
on a daily basis the leaders of the world say one thing do yet
another, saying one thing in public and yet another in private
What will it take for you to wake up to and accept this truth?
to be conceived in the first place, then surviving all sorts of illnesses,
disease and tragedy. I myself nearly died when i was born and again
a couple of years ago, not knowing at the time quite how close I came,
the journeys i have undertaken showed me not to fear dying and that
'Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey
rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass,
and then you see it.' So i don't fear death, dying painfully yes ;)
This informed me that there is so much more to life
An energy that we can summon from outside of us
A feeling within that resonates with those energies
The ability to meditate and feel your own life-force
The ancient tales and legends and myths spoke of
a truth that has been denied and corrupted many
times over the years since we lost our spiritual
heart and were given to believe that we need
others as our intermediaries to speak to 'god'
We look down on tribes people who claim to
have a tradition that can work wonders and
yes miracles and slowly our male dominant
hierarchy spoiled those tribal healers ability
they undermined the way of life suggesting
that men should be the religious leaders...
The western world goes around saying we will bring you freedom and democracy and in the next breath talks of 'Capturing Hearts & Minds'
We don't have it right any more than the communists did and yet we've been patting ourselves on the back ever since the fall of the berlin wall
Our economic system is a misnomer, because it is not sustainable
it is not economic except with the truth and that is that the planet
is dying and us with it unless or until we free ourselves from the
doctrine and dogma of churches and business leaders who say
profit and greed are good, keep filling our coffers and one day
we will resolve all of the worlds problems, yet they get worse
on a daily basis the leaders of the world say one thing do yet
another, saying one thing in public and yet another in private
What will it take for you to wake up to and accept this truth?
Sunday 15 December 2013
dum dum dum dum dum dum dum diddly dum dum dum nick cotton is back!
chaining fags worse than Dot Cotton when she's just heard Nick is back!
From the dead AGAIN! not petrified of everything and covering it, with
recreational drugs and toxic alcohol solutions anymore just living with a
general feeling of, no not uneasiness, a kind of nervous energy, a living
breathing sense of foregoading, not foreboding, something's gotta give
like the universe is about to give birth to something spectacular soon
and if i keep the faith, keep on experiencing things personally then
sharing and caring that it's gonna be an awesome end to a year
like the end of the very long year towards the restarting of the
mayan calendar, another cycle over, another just begun...
oh that sounds like a christmas song i prefer yule cos it
comes with a chocolate log and no insistence on god
as a man or a child or a holy spirit church blessed
wine in some cannibalistic fervour to embody a
christ within rather than being good to each
other first and foremost isn't already a
common sense way to world peace
and good will to all men and
women of the world
isnt it though
love?
x
From the dead AGAIN! not petrified of everything and covering it, with
recreational drugs and toxic alcohol solutions anymore just living with a
general feeling of, no not uneasiness, a kind of nervous energy, a living
breathing sense of foregoading, not foreboding, something's gotta give
like the universe is about to give birth to something spectacular soon
and if i keep the faith, keep on experiencing things personally then
sharing and caring that it's gonna be an awesome end to a year
like the end of the very long year towards the restarting of the
mayan calendar, another cycle over, another just begun...
oh that sounds like a christmas song i prefer yule cos it
comes with a chocolate log and no insistence on god
as a man or a child or a holy spirit church blessed
wine in some cannibalistic fervour to embody a
christ within rather than being good to each
other first and foremost isn't already a
common sense way to world peace
and good will to all men and
women of the world
isnt it though
love?
x
sit well
i
heard this saying "when the pain of staying the same becomes too great -
you change..." and so i guess that's why i did, why i felt as though
staying the same, always chasing a repeat of past glories rather than
searching for new experiences was the pain of staying the same for years
on end. Feeling as though although i've done what was expected of me,
got a career and all the trappings, none of
this is making me happy. At the same time there was a sense within me
that there was more to life, that i was meant for something better,
capable of so much more than I was miserably going through the motions
of work eat sleep work... The solar eclipse of 2000 was imminent and i
had an instinct along with so many others I had ignored over the years,
that I should be there, for some reason I was drawn away from the
doldrums...
I didn't go, didn't put in the effort, make plans, set things up so that I could
I didn't go, to a meditation class when I was 16 though i dearly wanted to
so many times i went with what my head or someones mouth told me to
don't rock the boat, don't look weird, don't be yourself, don't try give up
so many voices from the past, so much anger within releasing now...
back to square one again, i have explored the furthest reaches
of who i was and who i will be and who i am now and it hurt
it's still hurting, as parts of me ignored come back and grow
this journey was to find the truth outside but it's gone in
inside me all the resentment i had put on others not
realising all the while it was me who held back
who didnt say what i meant or did too much
every time i became and felt like me it
didnt sit well with teachers bosses
parents i think i prefer it when
he's miserable said jokingly?
those things stay with me
until i let them go at last
my conciousness was stretched out spread thin like too little butter on bread, i was nearly brown bread, the helpers and healers said so and
weren't sure i would come back from wherever it was i went so when
i did get back and slowly acclimatised to a much larger world and it's
still ongoing, social relationships for instance i just followed the crowd
rather than going with the flow, going with what i felt in my heart and
actually living free from all the rules and expectations i felt put under,
that i placed on myself, always the greatest of dreams no guts no ball
games allowed... I was precocious, in many ways, intelligence, wise
beyond my years and so i shrank back into myself because you didn't
like the fact that i could be so much more than you believed you could
be too. For me to stand out, grow up, learn and lose the old ways, to
finally feel like a man and in so doing show all others up for their total
lack of maturity. It's not easy to keep working and feeling blessed so,
but at least i no longer feel alone in the world, opening up again found
that this time, the first time i've ever really finally said it all, been it all,
i've finally found my friends, that they can be themselves with me now,
reveal their own secret identities and talents and powers and it's lush.
love
jon
x
I didn't go, didn't put in the effort, make plans, set things up so that I could
I didn't go, to a meditation class when I was 16 though i dearly wanted to
so many times i went with what my head or someones mouth told me to
don't rock the boat, don't look weird, don't be yourself, don't try give up
so many voices from the past, so much anger within releasing now...
back to square one again, i have explored the furthest reaches
of who i was and who i will be and who i am now and it hurt
it's still hurting, as parts of me ignored come back and grow
this journey was to find the truth outside but it's gone in
inside me all the resentment i had put on others not
realising all the while it was me who held back
who didnt say what i meant or did too much
every time i became and felt like me it
didnt sit well with teachers bosses
parents i think i prefer it when
he's miserable said jokingly?
those things stay with me
until i let them go at last
my conciousness was stretched out spread thin like too little butter on bread, i was nearly brown bread, the helpers and healers said so and
weren't sure i would come back from wherever it was i went so when
i did get back and slowly acclimatised to a much larger world and it's
still ongoing, social relationships for instance i just followed the crowd
rather than going with the flow, going with what i felt in my heart and
actually living free from all the rules and expectations i felt put under,
that i placed on myself, always the greatest of dreams no guts no ball
games allowed... I was precocious, in many ways, intelligence, wise
beyond my years and so i shrank back into myself because you didn't
like the fact that i could be so much more than you believed you could
be too. For me to stand out, grow up, learn and lose the old ways, to
finally feel like a man and in so doing show all others up for their total
lack of maturity. It's not easy to keep working and feeling blessed so,
but at least i no longer feel alone in the world, opening up again found
that this time, the first time i've ever really finally said it all, been it all,
i've finally found my friends, that they can be themselves with me now,
reveal their own secret identities and talents and powers and it's lush.
love
jon
x
Friday 13 December 2013
keeping it up
a complicated technique to cultivate compassion
or unconditional love may take years to embody
however a simple one like focussing on breaths
two half in breaths two half out breaths in out.
in in out out slowly faster whatever situation..
keeping you calm and alive and present x ...
that will work wonders if you just keep it up
or unconditional love may take years to embody
however a simple one like focussing on breaths
two half in breaths two half out breaths in out.
in in out out slowly faster whatever situation..
keeping you calm and alive and present x ...
that will work wonders if you just keep it up
unconventional unconditional love
when you breath in slow and deep
let your self relax then imagine
the air as a pure white liquid
filling you up entering your
heart and breathing out
darkness and pain let
the engine of your
heart burn away
your fears and
leave you in
joy love
jon
x
let your self relax then imagine
the air as a pure white liquid
filling you up entering your
heart and breathing out
darkness and pain let
the engine of your
heart burn away
your fears and
leave you in
joy love
jon
x
healing
- you:- I'm just intrigued as to the healing and stuff you do!!!me:- can be as simple as a positive intention for someone like a prayer you could say, or more lately sensing their energy field, where it seems weak fill it up with my surplus, often things are an energy imbalance then a physical symptom lateri often just say things like eat well sleep well take 5 minutes to yourself with your eyes closed whenever you can and just breath x total quackery, in my mind im drawing on the energy and loving power of everymoment that ever was is or will be and channeling it hrough me to whoever or everyoneat first i felt energy poolling in my palms this summer at festivals then experimented and found i could make the meditation gesture of the bhudda only bring the two hands together, the left palm up flat the right palm flat upright making a right angle, focussing the energy from my left with my right and thinking of people to send them energy, from there i use both hands like a 3d dimensional mri scanner to sense for weakness or damage to the energy body and resolve it through communicating with the person and sending them a little help then advice so they can produce their own flipping enregy from then on x
Thursday 12 December 2013
unilluminated the lights aint on and no-one is home
the illuminati? pah! they're just a bunch of girls
and boys whose psychic presence appears so
reptilian b'cos we have a reptile brain stem
so if you were ever in the same room as
one of those insidious creatures you'd
just use your higher fun-ctional cells
the mammal brain a rattish nature
played out in the rat race when
we fail to go even higher and
live inside the human neo
cortex the one area that
separates us from the
older more densely
oldfashioned bits
of our makeup
i prefer the
natural
look
x
and boys whose psychic presence appears so
reptilian b'cos we have a reptile brain stem
so if you were ever in the same room as
one of those insidious creatures you'd
just use your higher fun-ctional cells
the mammal brain a rattish nature
played out in the rat race when
we fail to go even higher and
live inside the human neo
cortex the one area that
separates us from the
older more densely
oldfashioned bits
of our makeup
i prefer the
natural
look
x
bastard love
love means never having to say you're sorry
hurting someones feelings without realising
is no excuse... i guess loving four women
but not loving them for them but a dream
of them loving me that's selfish and vane
so i wasnt loving them, but other friends
who i did not want to posess so much as
join. As i did so many years ago boohoo
hehe what a fucking numbskull numb
nuts 1 out of five is good odds in life
and love no? old habits are a
bastard
love
x
hurting someones feelings without realising
is no excuse... i guess loving four women
but not loving them for them but a dream
of them loving me that's selfish and vane
so i wasnt loving them, but other friends
who i did not want to posess so much as
join. As i did so many years ago boohoo
hehe what a fucking numbskull numb
nuts 1 out of five is good odds in life
and love no? old habits are a
bastard
love
x
thank god for cannabis chocolate and chai :) x
orgasms are good too
guided by the will of the force
rather than the force of the erm will
think with your heart let your brain compute
everything else falls into place nicely together then
to carry on playing lifes main game to progress up levels
and then party like it's 2099 of course hehe it's gonna be fun
feeling as though i could have quite happily married
one of four five god knows how many women
all of them actually one had my heart
one my soul and suddenly attention
it all got 'it's too 'complicated'
for little old me so i baled
as usual on everything
but had to to see
what was real
what dreams
what a life
eh?
x
guided by the will of the force
rather than the force of the erm will
think with your heart let your brain compute
everything else falls into place nicely together then
to carry on playing lifes main game to progress up levels
and then party like it's 2099 of course hehe it's gonna be fun
feeling as though i could have quite happily married
one of four five god knows how many women
all of them actually one had my heart
one my soul and suddenly attention
it all got 'it's too 'complicated'
for little old me so i baled
as usual on everything
but had to to see
what was real
what dreams
what a life
eh?
x
Wednesday 11 December 2013
11:54pm 11 december 1972
so at
11:54 pm this evening i will have been on this earth for forty one
years or so, just like to thank my mum and dad for putting up with me to
this day, my gran and gramp my nan and grandad passed and my sister x
two years or so ago i had an experience that nearly killed me, however...
soon followed a job interview, a two year period of assessment and
a job offer which i duly accepted from the divine, god and goddess
they are hard task masters and keep placing the people and trials
in front of me that are making me the man i always dreamed of
my psychic ability to read peoples possible futures and guide
my healing abilities massage, energy healing at a distance
my own intuition and instincts having been tested hard
bringing to me a sense of inner peace to take outer
into the world to show others they can feel it too
they can become more than they were told
more than they ever believed possible
more than i ever dreamed i could be
pinching myself less believing more
love love love
jon
x
two years or so ago i had an experience that nearly killed me, however...
soon followed a job interview, a two year period of assessment and
a job offer which i duly accepted from the divine, god and goddess
they are hard task masters and keep placing the people and trials
in front of me that are making me the man i always dreamed of
my psychic ability to read peoples possible futures and guide
my healing abilities massage, energy healing at a distance
my own intuition and instincts having been tested hard
bringing to me a sense of inner peace to take outer
into the world to show others they can feel it too
they can become more than they were told
more than they ever believed possible
more than i ever dreamed i could be
pinching myself less believing more
love love love
jon
x
Tuesday 10 December 2013
energy driving code
my friend came off his motorbike in tescos carpark
he's a postman so a few locals saw his epic fail
When he told me that he had hurt his wrist
i explained and he's very with it so all it
took was to say you know as well as
i that we are energy driving code
so charge up your chi, place
your hand over the area
imagine rewriting it
removing errors
allow healing
in its place
job done
love
x
he's a postman so a few locals saw his epic fail
When he told me that he had hurt his wrist
i explained and he's very with it so all it
took was to say you know as well as
i that we are energy driving code
so charge up your chi, place
your hand over the area
imagine rewriting it
removing errors
allow healing
in its place
job done
love
x
cutting it - faking it - making it
um yeah so medicine man doesnt really cut it
natural healer is what i've been going by
massage, energy healing, distance
is no object, neither's money
can't tell your fortune no
tell your futures yes
i sense them all
then tell you
which one
to aim
for
x
natural healer is what i've been going by
massage, energy healing, distance
is no object, neither's money
can't tell your fortune no
tell your futures yes
i sense them all
then tell you
which one
to aim
for
x
Sunday 8 December 2013
no matter - she's always been singing that phat lady we just tuned her out like a siren song heard it long enough you dont hear it no more
the basis of all life inanimate animate no matter
is an energy force a living breathing sentient
musical masterpiece the sound of spheres
floating on the space, around the empty
void without which none of this could
have sprung as if from imaginations
the daydreams of sleeping giants,
your life force energy, the same
source as your sexual prowess
the same source of all power
within and without the bang
big bada boom that began
all this was a giant cum
one massive full body
orgasm the cosmos
firing off squirting
life out of a tiny
crack in space
and time the
song of the
phat lady
is love
love
x
is an energy force a living breathing sentient
musical masterpiece the sound of spheres
floating on the space, around the empty
void without which none of this could
have sprung as if from imaginations
the daydreams of sleeping giants,
your life force energy, the same
source as your sexual prowess
the same source of all power
within and without the bang
big bada boom that began
all this was a giant cum
one massive full body
orgasm the cosmos
firing off squirting
life out of a tiny
crack in space
and time the
song of the
phat lady
is love
love
x
gifts to honour the creators
in terms of giving a gift to the gods this yuletide
self sacrifice has always been the best present
doing something good for someone else and
the feeling you get inside from doing just
that and then knowing you've changed
someone elses life for the better at
least in the short term which is all
we can count on as always was
as for gifts to a shaman they
tend to be anything needed
tobacco, herbs, food and
cash or a little offering
all of the above, cos
of course their gift
passed from one
to another, the
energy, from
above from
below, the
earth and
the sky.
Is free
love
x
self sacrifice has always been the best present
doing something good for someone else and
the feeling you get inside from doing just
that and then knowing you've changed
someone elses life for the better at
least in the short term which is all
we can count on as always was
as for gifts to a shaman they
tend to be anything needed
tobacco, herbs, food and
cash or a little offering
all of the above, cos
of course their gift
passed from one
to another, the
energy, from
above from
below, the
earth and
the sky.
Is free
love
x
burb?
my best friend reminded me that also he
had seen and encountered the spirit that
i met whilst walking home down the lane
through the wood, down the hill from the
gamekeepers cottage this spirit came to
me a little quickly and very friendly like
tried to put his arm around me like a
old friend does when you haven't
seen them in a long time guess
my new friend felt like that
bu in the end when my
love and my lack of
fear wouldn't show
him the way away
over the rainbow
to never ending
happy endings
i had to say friend. You recognise me, maybe not this body.
but you know the bit i mean, the spark of divinity within it,
the light at the end of the tunnel from wherever it was,
that we came from to come here when we were born.
Wanna see? Then start looking
dont dismiss anything
out of the corner
of your eye
a sound
a smell
a taste
of things to come
coming soon to a screen
you call your eyes when what we see
is created by our brain on the inside of our head
then what we see clears up into a picture from the fog of
all the information coming in that we are told is of no importance
like things we see that have no obvious rational explanation given
surely we must be rational to be otherwise is madness pure madness
well no it can be for a little while or a long won hard fought battle mind
to become a balance between who you are inside who you felt you could be and who you actually are to others, what they see, what you do...
the world has always been watching me i had that feeling
so i played up acted up showed off
now im in character
24/7 and it's
lush
x
had seen and encountered the spirit that
i met whilst walking home down the lane
through the wood, down the hill from the
gamekeepers cottage this spirit came to
me a little quickly and very friendly like
tried to put his arm around me like a
old friend does when you haven't
seen them in a long time guess
my new friend felt like that
bu in the end when my
love and my lack of
fear wouldn't show
him the way away
over the rainbow
to never ending
happy endings
i had to say friend. You recognise me, maybe not this body.
but you know the bit i mean, the spark of divinity within it,
the light at the end of the tunnel from wherever it was,
that we came from to come here when we were born.
Wanna see? Then start looking
dont dismiss anything
out of the corner
of your eye
a sound
a smell
a taste
of things to come
coming soon to a screen
you call your eyes when what we see
is created by our brain on the inside of our head
then what we see clears up into a picture from the fog of
all the information coming in that we are told is of no importance
like things we see that have no obvious rational explanation given
surely we must be rational to be otherwise is madness pure madness
well no it can be for a little while or a long won hard fought battle mind
to become a balance between who you are inside who you felt you could be and who you actually are to others, what they see, what you do...
the world has always been watching me i had that feeling
so i played up acted up showed off
now im in character
24/7 and it's
lush
x
all too well why
knows all to well why
you wont look me
in the eye it's
because they are
windows to my soul.
and you don't believe in those, me or yourself
to the extent that i do, believe in you and me
i mean to say, i feel you exist so i'm willing,
to take that one to the bank of mum & dad,
or to be more precise my creators in space
and time, not the ones who gave birth and
sputnicked me into exhistence here noooo.
As much as the man in the moon is death,
signified here by man's inhumanity to man
and our mother sun is the light of our lives
there are stranger things in heaven n earth
that's you that is
and me too
i know
you love me
i'm fucking weird
go figure?!?
i can't so
i'll just
love
it
you wont look me
in the eye it's
because they are
windows to my soul.
and you don't believe in those, me or yourself
to the extent that i do, believe in you and me
i mean to say, i feel you exist so i'm willing,
to take that one to the bank of mum & dad,
or to be more precise my creators in space
and time, not the ones who gave birth and
sputnicked me into exhistence here noooo.
As much as the man in the moon is death,
signified here by man's inhumanity to man
and our mother sun is the light of our lives
there are stranger things in heaven n earth
that's you that is
and me too
i know
you love me
i'm fucking weird
go figure?!?
i can't so
i'll just
love
it
on a grand adventure to stay here but live in a different world at the same time ;)
if you've got the patience to consult with me
i'll do my best not to insult your intelligence
give me the heads up, you're feeling how?
everything and everyone is a new lesson,
understanding patients is a puzzle piece
this jigsaw "goes a little something like
this..." RUN! it was like that but that's
not the way I is now I runs towards
a building on fire not away from it
Whatever the issue, you them us
WE CAN WORK IT OUT Together
I always liked solo Pursuits most
Trivial in nature, alone out there
I never had an issue that nature
couldn't solve finally given some
time in the wilderness breathing
in her relaxation her strength of
mind expressed in the way that
with or without us, Nature gets
to the future from the past, the
bit in the middle is called living
between birth and death there
are moments we call the now,
mini big bangs explosions into
reality made by us every time,
a new universe of possibilities
co-created and co-conspirited
into being by us the beings of
pure energy, light and love...
Deny this all you like, to your
hearts own discontent, those
who are onboard are leaving
There's believing something,
then also there's 'be living' it
I have been living it
living in love
in light
x
i'll do my best not to insult your intelligence
give me the heads up, you're feeling how?
everything and everyone is a new lesson,
understanding patients is a puzzle piece
this jigsaw "goes a little something like
this..." RUN! it was like that but that's
not the way I is now I runs towards
a building on fire not away from it
Whatever the issue, you them us
WE CAN WORK IT OUT Together
I always liked solo Pursuits most
Trivial in nature, alone out there
I never had an issue that nature
couldn't solve finally given some
time in the wilderness breathing
in her relaxation her strength of
mind expressed in the way that
with or without us, Nature gets
to the future from the past, the
bit in the middle is called living
between birth and death there
are moments we call the now,
mini big bangs explosions into
reality made by us every time,
a new universe of possibilities
co-created and co-conspirited
into being by us the beings of
pure energy, light and love...
Deny this all you like, to your
hearts own discontent, those
who are onboard are leaving
There's believing something,
then also there's 'be living' it
I have been living it
living in love
in light
x
Saturday 7 December 2013
max headroom 5ft8
the court jester was often the most talented magician
in fact they tended to be wise and confounding
so i take no pleasure in having to remind
that when im working im professional
i cannot become physically aroused
because i'd end up in the wrong
head space so to speak and
then not be in the right
one, the heart space.
in fact they tended to be wise and confounding
so i take no pleasure in having to remind
that when im working im professional
i cannot become physically aroused
because i'd end up in the wrong
head space so to speak and
then not be in the right
one, the heart space.
the ugly truth
it aint good to make too many predictions so
i only did the one i did about the winter
at the 5d party this year in summer
but here's one for you now...
the number of god concious people 18 months ago was numbered in the hundreds of thousands...
my feeling now is that it'll be 2 million soon if not already
and 30 million monkeys by the next couple of years
this is inevitable do not fear what you cant
understand but you can feel in your heart
you know how we react to danger and
the mighty force of nature we come
together and the good and the bad
are shown for who they truly are
i only did the one i did about the winter
at the 5d party this year in summer
but here's one for you now...
the number of god concious people 18 months ago was numbered in the hundreds of thousands...
my feeling now is that it'll be 2 million soon if not already
and 30 million monkeys by the next couple of years
this is inevitable do not fear what you cant
understand but you can feel in your heart
you know how we react to danger and
the mighty force of nature we come
together and the good and the bad
are shown for who they truly are
you blew me
women disrupt my flow
there ive said it
you blew me
off course
but thats
living with
out them not
with em necessarily so go
with the flow, learn not
to take it for granted,
or anyone, anything.
except you guessed
it pick it up it's
yours no need
to sign for
anything
it's free
breath
it in
x
there ive said it
you blew me
off course
but thats
living with
out them not
with em necessarily so go
with the flow, learn not
to take it for granted,
or anyone, anything.
except you guessed
it pick it up it's
yours no need
to sign for
anything
it's free
breath
it in
x
be like water my friend
ever
play the concious attention game? your place your intent that your
conciousness goes to the body part you think of... left big toe, wait
for a register inside, like a little click that says im there, we're
there, and then choose another, once youve done this, especially out to
your extremeties for a few weeks and months it becomes easy to meditate
in your heart
forever
love
x
in your heart
forever
love
x
Friday 6 December 2013
saint lawrence
the
few hairs ive got on the top of my head are standin up after a most
bodacious experience quite shocking for a second or two but overall the
most thrilling thing i've ever actually lived through, or at least top 5
x
i just met a spirit, walking up the road towards me like a ghost, i believed
it to be an animal and in the way that our eyes interpret what is there and put a picture in our mind of what is there or a thought or an emotional reaction or memory or sensual experience i saw what i thought was a deers bum going away from me, but it disappeared into thin air and became clearer in one way when i used second sight, blurry eyes at first
then a blurry vision within the field of view, an outline foggy at first then more concrete like a clear opauque gel like substance pertaining the spirit with a ready brek outline only in a very thin white gold tinged fuzzy but distinct aura around them. I was concerned because they approaced me even though i had hailed them as brother or sister sensing a friendly almost over friendly atttiude my personal space was being invaded to some degree and i feared the result, would i become posessed by him?
or her? this is new i can only see when they move, theyre, what? looking back i can see they were trying to put an arm around me as a friend.
theyve missed that, having someone to connect to, talk to, hug, squeeze
i was overwhelmed for a second or two although that passed as i decided to focus on my heart and the love i send out, i give love and receive love
not the other way around, i dont fight for some primacy i fight for truth
so i went to my heart and i closed my eyes all the while too into being slightly scared but massively exhiliirated a.t.same time
there were more, i was circled and again my love tested let go breath
for fucks sake breath. although i rarely panick except when its communication with the livng humans not animals or dead peeps
you lot make me far more afraid than anything else made of energy
that ive encountered. hell i even scare myself sometimes, more than you
thats made me closer to god because of my fervent wish not to die
after wishing to die once or twice really sincerely then getting ill
then wishing to live and missing living already come one do summat
oh so i got the sense roman although there are plenty of villas within 10 miles this IS roman britain, bath to oxford pilgrimage of saint lawrence
whose name is remembered in the story of the day he passed through
the village where i live and he blessed the spring there saying
it shall never run dry
it never has
love
jon
x
some of them went i got a vague energy rush nothing like the three souls i've helped so far.. so im guessing some of them want a conversation before they move one x
i just met a spirit, walking up the road towards me like a ghost, i believed
it to be an animal and in the way that our eyes interpret what is there and put a picture in our mind of what is there or a thought or an emotional reaction or memory or sensual experience i saw what i thought was a deers bum going away from me, but it disappeared into thin air and became clearer in one way when i used second sight, blurry eyes at first
then a blurry vision within the field of view, an outline foggy at first then more concrete like a clear opauque gel like substance pertaining the spirit with a ready brek outline only in a very thin white gold tinged fuzzy but distinct aura around them. I was concerned because they approaced me even though i had hailed them as brother or sister sensing a friendly almost over friendly atttiude my personal space was being invaded to some degree and i feared the result, would i become posessed by him?
or her? this is new i can only see when they move, theyre, what? looking back i can see they were trying to put an arm around me as a friend.
theyve missed that, having someone to connect to, talk to, hug, squeeze
i was overwhelmed for a second or two although that passed as i decided to focus on my heart and the love i send out, i give love and receive love
not the other way around, i dont fight for some primacy i fight for truth
so i went to my heart and i closed my eyes all the while too into being slightly scared but massively exhiliirated a.t.same time
there were more, i was circled and again my love tested let go breath
for fucks sake breath. although i rarely panick except when its communication with the livng humans not animals or dead peeps
you lot make me far more afraid than anything else made of energy
that ive encountered. hell i even scare myself sometimes, more than you
thats made me closer to god because of my fervent wish not to die
after wishing to die once or twice really sincerely then getting ill
then wishing to live and missing living already come one do summat
oh so i got the sense roman although there are plenty of villas within 10 miles this IS roman britain, bath to oxford pilgrimage of saint lawrence
whose name is remembered in the story of the day he passed through
the village where i live and he blessed the spring there saying
it shall never run dry
it never has
love
jon
x
some of them went i got a vague energy rush nothing like the three souls i've helped so far.. so im guessing some of them want a conversation before they move one x
camora obbskurra
god dont you just love being right all the time? no?
oh thats what we're here for, to make mistakes
and learn things that we can't elsewhere
and do things we cant maybe too?
hmm im gonna make sure to
experience everything ive
got coming to me in the
future then by being
ready for it now
i knew i was
a man when
the thought
of children
didnt scare
the shit out
of me when i
was only dating
someone but knew
she had a good heart
someone i could love and
trust forever its that instant &
when you're not so self controlled
nobody's in control of you except you. trust! look!
♥
10. Love is all there is. Finding and reconnecting to love again is the most important thing we can do as humans. Source is unconditional love, and we are sparks of source- which means we are also love. Therefore we are that we seek. Loving ourselves unconditionally is the key to returning to source.
oh thats what we're here for, to make mistakes
and learn things that we can't elsewhere
and do things we cant maybe too?
hmm im gonna make sure to
experience everything ive
got coming to me in the
future then by being
ready for it now
i knew i was
a man when
the thought
of children
didnt scare
the shit out
of me when i
was only dating
someone but knew
she had a good heart
someone i could love and
trust forever its that instant &
when you're not so self controlled
nobody's in control of you except you. trust! look!
♥
10. Love is all there is. Finding and reconnecting to love again is the most important thing we can do as humans. Source is unconditional love, and we are sparks of source- which means we are also love. Therefore we are that we seek. Loving ourselves unconditionally is the key to returning to source.
Tuesday 3 December 2013
per version 2.0
if you could see how perverted your life was
like the perversion, of justice and freedoms
perverted's wishing total control of another
rather than a known illusion, of dominance
playing games is fine, as long as our aims
to be not childish but wonderfully childlike
if love's in doubt use your imagination 1st
like the perversion, of justice and freedoms
perverted's wishing total control of another
rather than a known illusion, of dominance
playing games is fine, as long as our aims
to be not childish but wonderfully childlike
if love's in doubt use your imagination 1st
you deserve love
when you give me the gift of honouring my fragility
i return the favour by honouring your strength
some say you make me weak i know it
the truest form of expression is
that you make me strong
you make me want
NO! Need to be
the man you
deserve
love
x
i return the favour by honouring your strength
some say you make me weak i know it
the truest form of expression is
that you make me strong
you make me want
NO! Need to be
the man you
deserve
love
x
passe pathe
as an empath i feel others pain literally feel it
i'll ask my friend sarah c if she's got a b or z
wrong at the moment cos my arms hurting
or my neck sore like a clusterfuck of hurts
they combine to make me feel like a pin
cushion, a true voodoo doll or at least
in my case tempered in fire and brim
ming with resilience from having been brutalised by others verbally
or mentally as in telepathically or whatever you wish to name it
i can tell what people are thinking literally the words BUT ONLY
IF ITS SOMETHING YOU WANT ME TO KNOW, we all do it!!!
when you know someone well enough you dont mind sharing
to that extent and many more x _ x
we are legion
we are
one
x
i'll ask my friend sarah c if she's got a b or z
wrong at the moment cos my arms hurting
or my neck sore like a clusterfuck of hurts
they combine to make me feel like a pin
cushion, a true voodoo doll or at least
in my case tempered in fire and brim
ming with resilience from having been brutalised by others verbally
or mentally as in telepathically or whatever you wish to name it
i can tell what people are thinking literally the words BUT ONLY
IF ITS SOMETHING YOU WANT ME TO KNOW, we all do it!!!
when you know someone well enough you dont mind sharing
to that extent and many more x _ x
we are legion
we are
one
x
crimson tide (i just thought that up it's a film , a bad film, im going to watch crimson tide now to see how bad it is so bad its good?
in my minds eye in my heart
there is an central island
a tropical paradise on
which stands a lake
within which is an
island covered in
fruit trees of all
kinds within the
island is a lake
within that an
island with a
scarlet princedom and within a lush and green secret garden
is the crimson palace of my heart where i reside with our loves
and there loves theirs and within the palace a lake on which stands
an island and at the centre of that island is the ever wishing tree alive
whatever i wish shall sprout forth
but never for me
ever
x
there is an central island
a tropical paradise on
which stands a lake
within which is an
island covered in
fruit trees of all
kinds within the
island is a lake
within that an
island with a
scarlet princedom and within a lush and green secret garden
is the crimson palace of my heart where i reside with our loves
and there loves theirs and within the palace a lake on which stands
an island and at the centre of that island is the ever wishing tree alive
whatever i wish shall sprout forth
but never for me
ever
x
parvati siva
i visited with the asian gods
with shiva and parvati i
want to say that is
who came to
my mind
There i was in the palace, was it a memory, or a real dream...
some say that trips are just hallucinations but then how be
come all our trips are of the same character generally
with the same characters, chemical parameters you
and it
whilst in the palace my love was near
her face unseen not hidden not
there as if not found if not
missing if not discovered
then i was told the first
love story of all and
so yes i have high
standards for
myself and
others
only amazing will do x
p.s. his royal highness
requests that it is parvati first
ahnd himself to arive later
always
x
with shiva and parvati i
want to say that is
who came to
my mind
There i was in the palace, was it a memory, or a real dream...
some say that trips are just hallucinations but then how be
come all our trips are of the same character generally
with the same characters, chemical parameters you
and it
whilst in the palace my love was near
her face unseen not hidden not
there as if not found if not
missing if not discovered
then i was told the first
love story of all and
so yes i have high
standards for
myself and
others
only amazing will do x
p.s. his royal highness
requests that it is parvati first
ahnd himself to arive later
always
x
Monday 2 December 2013
your majesty the peasants are revolting
calling someone highness might
suggest to some that they are
the lowerness in some way?
God's chosen whatever on
earth as it is in heaven?
Um actually over there
it's a merit-tocracy...
and it is crazy merry.
Everyone shares all
the joy and the pain
the celebration of
livng beyond all
our believed,
or 'be lived'
or lived by
inherited,
inherent
limits
x
suggest to some that they are
the lowerness in some way?
God's chosen whatever on
earth as it is in heaven?
Um actually over there
it's a merit-tocracy...
and it is crazy merry.
Everyone shares all
the joy and the pain
the celebration of
livng beyond all
our believed,
or 'be lived'
or lived by
inherited,
inherent
limits
x
less high ness more medium ship
calling someone highness might
suggest to some that they are
the lowerness in some way?
God's chosen whatever on
earth as it is in heaven?
Um actually over there
it's a merrytocracy...
Everyone shares all
the joy and the pain
the celebration of
livng beyond all
our believed,
or 'be lived'
or lived by
inherited,
inherent
limits
x
suggest to some that they are
the lowerness in some way?
God's chosen whatever on
earth as it is in heaven?
Um actually over there
it's a merrytocracy...
Everyone shares all
the joy and the pain
the celebration of
livng beyond all
our believed,
or 'be lived'
or lived by
inherited,
inherent
limits
x
rage into the machine and out again
i wasn't sure that anyone could actually accept me for who i really am
so i went around avoiding being who i really am to make sure they,
didn't prove me right, unfortunately it doesn't seem to be working
these days and i'm having to put up with having people around.
have to say i quite like it you know you're not all bad in fact i'd
say i havent met anyone i couldnt get along with ok or without just killin em
the subject of killing i havent killed a thing since oh yeah every
step i take every breath i make i kill myself as i die a little each
day. Making the most of that now that i actually feel it when i'm
not active, full of piss and vinegar and rage unchained to release it
leaving it all on the dancefloor... to receieve the most blissful times and
experiences
of my life
:D x <3 br="">
so i went around avoiding being who i really am to make sure they,
didn't prove me right, unfortunately it doesn't seem to be working
these days and i'm having to put up with having people around.
have to say i quite like it you know you're not all bad in fact i'd
say i havent met anyone i couldnt get along with ok or without just killin em
the subject of killing i havent killed a thing since oh yeah every
step i take every breath i make i kill myself as i die a little each
day. Making the most of that now that i actually feel it when i'm
not active, full of piss and vinegar and rage unchained to release it
leaving it all on the dancefloor... to receieve the most blissful times and
experiences
of my life
:D x <3 br="">
if the universe has three 13 plus dimensions and we are in the universe doesnt that make us 13 plus dimensional too?
some might say that men are fairly one dimensional
and that women are two, as they've always had in
their heart the knowledge there could be another
life waiting to grow inside them one day soon.
For me i would say we're all at least three,
i'll let you into a secret, i start with an idea.
I write that down at let the rest flow like,
a river runs through it they said, this...
Sometimes diverting rapidly to steer
the course of the flow in the right
general direction, sometimes just
sticking with the main idea itself.
Letting it work it's own mind up,
the thing, the poem, status, crapola whatever you want to call it
it's a stream of conciousness, it's taken me many years to get to
this level and many periods of shaming myself and i hope not too
many others as i fear to my eternal disgrace... Embarassment is
actually dangerous, it prevents us from doing what we feel like doing...
I know i was constantly reminded of everything i've ever done by others,
constantly reminded of all the times i fucked up, for comic relief, thankyou i can finally thank all the people who called me names the ones i apologised to that i bullied or hurt as i went around my lifetime
visiting those old days myself for the first time on my own
and i did go round and my best friend is my only friend
from those days that i keep in touch with and we're
going to spain next year to walk the camino and
unleash donquixote and sancho panza (panca)
on southern france and northern spain on El
Camino de Santiago
hasta luego
x
Yo hice el Camino de Santiago
and that women are two, as they've always had in
their heart the knowledge there could be another
life waiting to grow inside them one day soon.
For me i would say we're all at least three,
i'll let you into a secret, i start with an idea.
I write that down at let the rest flow like,
a river runs through it they said, this...
Sometimes diverting rapidly to steer
the course of the flow in the right
general direction, sometimes just
sticking with the main idea itself.
Letting it work it's own mind up,
the thing, the poem, status, crapola whatever you want to call it
it's a stream of conciousness, it's taken me many years to get to
this level and many periods of shaming myself and i hope not too
many others as i fear to my eternal disgrace... Embarassment is
actually dangerous, it prevents us from doing what we feel like doing...
I know i was constantly reminded of everything i've ever done by others,
constantly reminded of all the times i fucked up, for comic relief, thankyou i can finally thank all the people who called me names the ones i apologised to that i bullied or hurt as i went around my lifetime
visiting those old days myself for the first time on my own
and i did go round and my best friend is my only friend
from those days that i keep in touch with and we're
going to spain next year to walk the camino and
unleash donquixote and sancho panza (panca)
on southern france and northern spain on El
Camino de Santiago
hasta luego
x
Yo hice el Camino de Santiago
in touch out of touch
'in touch with'
means a different
thing to some people
to me it means you
actually get face time
to others it means a
text once in a while...
'out of touch'
we write about the
senses but we don't
use them so often
these days, we mask
our scent, wear a
different face outside
means a different
thing to some people
to me it means you
actually get face time
to others it means a
text once in a while...
'out of touch'
we write about the
senses but we don't
use them so often
these days, we mask
our scent, wear a
different face outside
tick tic ti i it cit kcit
OK YES! i do positively discriminate in favour of women
partly because they are the fairer sex as in more fair
partly because they're much worse and better ok
in that they have a greater range of emotional
and psychological depth i.e. strength T R U E
they have to be able to do everything we can
and more because they can bring life into the
world, ok not without our help as yet the old x
and y chromosome thing, we're being fazed out
like some kind of drug trial that went wrong anyway
So yes i am for women more than men and against men
a little but, i mean come on, what do you expect?
i'm fairly sure my father would prefer it
if I married a woman from another
country or race, he's positively
discriminating against us
too cos we're shit
as a people i
learned that
from my
friends
that come from Poland and elsewhere... we dont act right
partly because they are the fairer sex as in more fair
partly because they're much worse and better ok
in that they have a greater range of emotional
and psychological depth i.e. strength T R U E
they have to be able to do everything we can
and more because they can bring life into the
world, ok not without our help as yet the old x
and y chromosome thing, we're being fazed out
like some kind of drug trial that went wrong anyway
So yes i am for women more than men and against men
a little but, i mean come on, what do you expect?
i'm fairly sure my father would prefer it
if I married a woman from another
country or race, he's positively
discriminating against us
too cos we're shit
as a people i
learned that
from my
friends
that come from Poland and elsewhere... we dont act right
seeing naturally being natural
it felt so natural to see you the first time
to think of you as a friend, drawn to you
knowing theres something for you in me
yes a little friendship can go a long way
towards making me feel so very happy
and i know how much it means to me
to have every one of you in my life x
to think of you as a friend, drawn to you
knowing theres something for you in me
yes a little friendship can go a long way
towards making me feel so very happy
and i know how much it means to me
to have every one of you in my life x
thats enuff bout me now you...
i feel as though i wasn't myself
took me too long to rediscover
who i am and what i stand for
for me, there is no tomorrow
there's today, only now, only
you and now that i feel like,
the person i truly am inside
i can be myself again more
so thanks for your kindness
that releases the love i feel
so very deep, inside of me.
took me too long to rediscover
who i am and what i stand for
for me, there is no tomorrow
there's today, only now, only
you and now that i feel like,
the person i truly am inside
i can be myself again more
so thanks for your kindness
that releases the love i feel
so very deep, inside of me.
Sunday 1 December 2013
a hard place
once you hit rock bottom
you've got two choices
top yourself or build
back up from solid
foundations and
create a new
life rather
than the
old one
GO!
x
you've got two choices
top yourself or build
back up from solid
foundations and
create a new
life rather
than the
old one
GO!
x
dis mis nomer
i was born prematurely so it matters not to me
if the way i choose to lead this life means that
i die before your life is ended with dishonour
that way i'll have lived with honour respect
all the good things we deny exist in our
selves and in each other... When i
was young everyone was a friend
until or unless they proved to be
otherwise, now it seems like
we all see each other as a
threat perhaps that's just
the result of finding an
easy target and bomb
a religion a figure
someone we can
demonise rather
than see that
it's us who
live a lie.
Speak
Truth
Now
x
if the way i choose to lead this life means that
i die before your life is ended with dishonour
that way i'll have lived with honour respect
all the good things we deny exist in our
selves and in each other... When i
was young everyone was a friend
until or unless they proved to be
otherwise, now it seems like
we all see each other as a
threat perhaps that's just
the result of finding an
easy target and bomb
a religion a figure
someone we can
demonise rather
than see that
it's us who
live a lie.
Speak
Truth
Now
x
not taking part any more you fuckers! im playing my own role in my own play
this world gave me life, my mother too
so i owe her a living and the world
we're playing along, aiding our
own destruction by being
pawns in someone
else's idea of
what life
should
be
x
so i owe her a living and the world
we're playing along, aiding our
own destruction by being
pawns in someone
else's idea of
what life
should
be
x
this moment
off to cycle to the garage for supplies
i dont want to talk about yesterday
or tomorrow when i could spend
THIS entire moment with you.
i dont want to talk about yesterday
or tomorrow when i could spend
THIS entire moment with you.
staging a love in
did anyone else notice that the tech
in the new james bond skyfall was
well old school a tracker and gun
well as much as the stuff they
have is years decades away
from what we have now
it doesnt work solving
earthly issues nope
its useless they're
intractable. Until
we get working
on them more
naturally with
love in our
hearts
x
in the new james bond skyfall was
well old school a tracker and gun
well as much as the stuff they
have is years decades away
from what we have now
it doesnt work solving
earthly issues nope
its useless they're
intractable. Until
we get working
on them more
naturally with
love in our
hearts
x
a round a bout
for around ten or fifteen years i was haunted
oh not that guy he was around my whole life
no this was the fact that two friends saw me
as the devil whilst they were tripping and so
as i progressed in my own journeys seeing,
it came to pass that my friend became the
devil to me, my own projection onto him,
of my own devilish nature and i realised
that if i fought back i would create it so
i laid there, facing away, feeling truly
terrorfied, knowing i would die any
moment, saying in my mind, yes
go on kill me ill never renounce
love whatever you offer to give
me whatever you tempt me
with i will never say no
to love or take that
path so please
end it all and
i found my
heart
x
oh not that guy he was around my whole life
no this was the fact that two friends saw me
as the devil whilst they were tripping and so
as i progressed in my own journeys seeing,
it came to pass that my friend became the
devil to me, my own projection onto him,
of my own devilish nature and i realised
that if i fought back i would create it so
i laid there, facing away, feeling truly
terrorfied, knowing i would die any
moment, saying in my mind, yes
go on kill me ill never renounce
love whatever you offer to give
me whatever you tempt me
with i will never say no
to love or take that
path so please
end it all and
i found my
heart
x
growing pains
well used to growing pains after
being 4ft9 till i was seventeen
they weighed and measured
poked prodded talked bout
cow growth hormones but
one doctor saw me most
gave me a prediction i
held onto that i would
grow until i was 21
and i did to 5 ft 8
a friend told me
to hold my back
differently rite
up and its
hurtin but
healing
thanks
love
x
being 4ft9 till i was seventeen
they weighed and measured
poked prodded talked bout
cow growth hormones but
one doctor saw me most
gave me a prediction i
held onto that i would
grow until i was 21
and i did to 5 ft 8
a friend told me
to hold my back
differently rite
up and its
hurtin but
healing
thanks
love
x
fairy tales
fantasies so many shows and films
playing on sexual romantic tension
two characters drawn together
where best friends cant risk it
when they do it goes wrong
horribly and tragically cos
that makes for great tv
or it goes far too easily
like a fairytale ending
so whats the truth?
truth is its both
and neither
write your
own dam
story
x
playing on sexual romantic tension
two characters drawn together
where best friends cant risk it
when they do it goes wrong
horribly and tragically cos
that makes for great tv
or it goes far too easily
like a fairytale ending
so whats the truth?
truth is its both
and neither
write your
own dam
story
x
remembering why i dont drink much anymore :/
not going anywhere
here to stay for the
forseeable and yes
the unforseen too
it's jus so excitin
waiting to see
how it turns
out so on
wards
now
x
here to stay for the
forseeable and yes
the unforseen too
it's jus so excitin
waiting to see
how it turns
out so on
wards
now
x
jingle bells
i told you the truth as i saw
that is why you and i dont
see eye to eye no we
dont see each other
any more a-gains-t
or for a gain seen
i told you lie and
they may be the
last words you
say to me
True
x
that is why you and i dont
see eye to eye no we
dont see each other
any more a-gains-t
or for a gain seen
i told you lie and
they may be the
last words you
say to me
True
x
thankyou india thankyou terror ;) x
hmmmmm nervous energy i felt it
i'm grateful for it so i thankyou..
not for waiting nervously...
with a pint bought with
my last few quid but
for the opportunity
to get off my ass
look smartish
feel good
waiting
hoping
and
i
think
it was why
i collapsed at 9pm
and woke up now at 5ish
Loving the freedom from fear
loving the way everything falls into
places i've never been or at least
not for a long old timey wimey
these days are fun fuelled
fun filled along with the
usual let downs and
get back ups
again
x
i'm grateful for it so i thankyou..
not for waiting nervously...
with a pint bought with
my last few quid but
for the opportunity
to get off my ass
look smartish
feel good
waiting
hoping
and
i
think
it was why
i collapsed at 9pm
and woke up now at 5ish
Loving the freedom from fear
loving the way everything falls into
places i've never been or at least
not for a long old timey wimey
these days are fun fuelled
fun filled along with the
usual let downs and
get back ups
again
x
thankyou frailty
ive been on two dates my entire life
the first in 2011 was extraordinary
the second one was a non starta
well i say that but i showed up
the other person didn't show
it must feel awful for them?
felt okay to me not to know
then to know what was or
wasn't going on. Did it
sound too good to be
true or was that me
looking back and
wondering why
i said yes in
the first
place?
hmm
<3>
x
the first in 2011 was extraordinary
the second one was a non starta
well i say that but i showed up
the other person didn't show
it must feel awful for them?
felt okay to me not to know
then to know what was or
wasn't going on. Did it
sound too good to be
true or was that me
looking back and
wondering why
i said yes in
the first
place?
hmm
<3>
x
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)