sppirit

the more ilearn the less iknow it seems and so it goes and flows and streams and then i thought to say something normal like oh what was it about now? some thing mundane and ordinary and nonmagical and how can i keep on going betwixt two worlds be there and here all at the same time well the truth is i was always a little or a lot over there when i ought to have been here doing things, not not trying and taking part more but my art was to smile constantly as though i was feeling comfortable but inside i was a bag of nerves, like all the time and so this cover became a cloak, my drawing or self introspection a self defence mechanism reeling from love at first sight. That faked confidence became real after pride came before a fall a few times or more and those lonely parts in a room full of friends just turned into a friend to everyone, everything, everywhere and aching with release and gaining bliss as a concretion disk gathered like moss over years of rolling down hills and climbing back up again or laying there in the valley of tears and waning and fading fast then at last gasp an eclipse an approaching millenium, that feeling inside when you were a kid, the energy between your hands, the life the massage you gave the skills you imagined and thrilled to discover to become yours if you earn them and learn them through play and lay the foundation for today and yay this thingy is coming to an end and i can send myself off into a dreamless ish sleep until the morning to meditate and enervate and energise and sigilise myself as an image of the body inside and out the one that throbs and hums softly and hovers, no doubt youve seen it and called it a ghost but we're all spirits, just the ones who can eat drink and be merry for now winter is coming, Winter is coming, WINTER IS COMING! sorry John Snow for a mo there, um yeah it's going to be a harsh one from the middle of november ish so batten down the hatches and get ready for some sledging and shizzle peace +

nom om nom

there's a beating intelligent heartbeat in the heart of my gut brain explains the fainting and the feinting away from serious play and hard work no grounding from that deepest of deeply felt earth shattering drum beats in the deep of the belly rumbling grumbling feed me the right energy let go of the old style hard solid food baby crying dying taking in new life boom boom shaking feeling the vibe of the room swooning crooning again singing dancing flying around laughing till the muscles at the back of the head say hey its been too long since you cried till you laughed and laughed till you cried and held your stomach and said spread a little happiness as you go by please try we sigh and hear a little lie on the air to be fair we all do that to ourselves first and then pass it off as the truth struth forsooth my tooth my tooth i think i broke my tooth the future is now the past is gone shone a light on on on on on on on on anon om om om om om nom nom nom brekkie +

5 star All Fall Down All Get Up

potential energy between two distant objects is greater than those close together
or in other words my dearest ones absence makes the heart grow fonder +++++

Holding out my hands out ;)

Allow myself to introduce myself

Hold your hands out.  Palms facing me as though you were doing jazz hands, only hold em still and pay attention to the centre of your palms and to the tops of your fingers ant then wait for a little while see.

For me it's only growing stronger, pulsing out from my heart into my hands, reaching my extremities and then starting back for home again, feeding back to my heart where it began, as the result of two streams of energy having met there, engaged, become entwined like strands of dna and carried on their way, down from the sky and up from the earth, through us all as though we are written like a vertical line in a living poem. 

We're the energy that moves, everything else stays still, holographic reality check.  So I'm doing it now, awwing at the energy, seeing the energy, feeling the energy, sensing the energy, sending the energy off.  All around me and filling me up, feeling calm although my mind is screaming bloody murder, ego consta-moaning trying to put me off, my game, my train, of thought, off the right track.  See it filling my entire being from the inside out, from the outside in, see it, feel it, sense it, energy coming in through the navel and out through the heart, a binary system giving us two pulmonary pumps, one in, one out, surrounding a void inbetween them, a singularity, a black hole of infinite possibility, a space, into which anything could come into existence in this old reality.  So why not me?  Ask yourself that question. Every question you ask someone, ask you first.