A few years ago I almost died, as a result of a reaction to two different so called recreational drugs, in truth they had an effect along the lines of entheogens, literally god givers, ways to explore the divine, to experience a level of conciousness above the so called norm, and that time was hard to recover from. However, because I was seeking such experiences, on a spiritual path, a journey to discover the truth of life itself, I now finally know and reflect upon it as not a bad trip but a good one.
Enlightenment was the result for a short period, 8 hours or so of ranting and raving and near death through heat exhaustion, on a hot summers days, not taking on water i was given nearly expiring.
What i remember is brief, moments, snapshots of feeling as though I was god.
Afterwards I was very disassociated from people, my body racked with pain. My muscles were cramped, i was dehydrated but actually none the worse after some food and water and care.
Two weeks afterwards I was fully recovered in body but not in mind, I suffered delusions of grandure at the time and a high level of self confidence that became unwieldy myself and unwelcome to others.
As I slowly came down from that high time I found my old issues resurfacing, a lack of self confidence, not egotism the other one negotism I suppose you might say, a feeling I have suffered a lot in life, not knowing what i wished for myself, following the crowd, the group mind, to work, to live to work to live. The journey continues as I find that this place is hellish and heavenly.
Our state of mind can take us there, to feeling as though we would rather not be here or feeling as though we are in a state of grace that could never be surpassed, the truth is that this could be heaven.
Those in charge or at least feel as though they are, will do anything to prevent the collapse of the systems in place at the moment to control the expression of life on this planet, warring and murdering as they go, around the world, normal people are drawn into a conspiracy, a hidden agenda, less so now as it falls under the weight of its own immoral nature, a crime against nature, death to life.
Terrorism and the fear of death or crime or any other of a hundred ways in which we can have our lives controlled to allow this system to continue maintains a shallow and increasingly loose grip on our own conciousness, we find ways to pass time that when we die we will look back on and say why?
Was it worth it just to see a show on t.v. or a film or play a game rather than truly living now?
One trip of mine, taken very seriously, a shamanic journey in the heritage of our natural living past took me to the edge of reason as I was told that all of those things are merely distractions.
Even if we agree that there is no conspiracy and that such theories are false, the truth still says that there is more to living than merely getting from birth to death, we can live and experience grace, experience not just moments of pure clarity and the feeling we get at certain times in life such as the birth of a child, or standing alone on a mountain top, those moments or minutes or hours of living in the flow, living in the pure heavenly joy of true life can be stretched and grow and become the way.
The way we live day to day, the way we live until we die, only to find at the moment of death, we can choose, we can choose to let go, of our attachment to things, to people we loved, to this life here.
We can choose to experience the truth, the way, enlightenment, spiritual heavenly eternal life.
To get there, it is necessary to renounce all the bad things that we are caught up in.
Lying, cheating, stealing, all the sins of the religions, though they are systems too.
Systems of control, to keep women, or migrants, or other races, peoples down.
The truth of the matter is that we are not matter, we are energy, we are spirit.
Life does go on, eternally elsewhere, to get there you need to be prepared.
How to do that?
Learn more about yourself, experience the things that others have, search for yourself.
Don't take someone elses word for anything, take it onboard but it is your life.
Your experiences that count, it is only you that can do this.
Noone is going to save you, liberate you, no saviour but you.
Faith in a god without a connection to the divine is blind faith.
The truth is that the divine is not a man or a woman.
My teacher of the last ten days S.N. Goenke said something so wonderful in one of his discourses, he said that man made god in his image.
We have literally personified god as we do to our pets or to cartoon characters, making fish talk or dressing up dogs or putting our stamp on anything that we dont understand such as god or goddess.
Yes, experiences i have had, had at that time, taught me that the divine comes to us as people.
I met God in the form of Zeus and the Goddess in the form of Hera, they were the earliest representations that i was familiar with, so they introduced themselves as such, to make it easier for me to cope with? I don't know... It was a job interview of sorts, my role to become a shaman, to become someone with a connection to those on earth, socially as when i meet and speak to people and to have a connection to the divine spiritual beings and whatever god or goddess actually is.
We are all shaman and shawomen, we are all capable of such experiences in a controlled and safe way, however the laws of man, of the men mostly who have ruled for thousands of years make it very difficult, illegal in their eyes to have those experiences, so it can be a dangerous path, however...
That is no reason not to attempt it, and when you find someone you can trust to lead you, guide you
That is when you have found the source.
The reason for being, the truth.
And then it is over.
This is over.
My journey however continues, I have been told that I will reach enlightenment again, and this is a shoddy example but in the Harry Potter movie, where he is led dying he sees what he believes is his father come to save him, later when he experiences the same moment again having travelled back in time, he realises it was he himself who saved him. That is what happened to me, I saved myself.
I wanted to know the truth, and a part of me only accessible when you search for it, or are near death, came back from the future, came back from my death, travelled along my own timeline to save me.
Literally showing me the way out, what I can become, what i became then, afterwards
and am reaching out for once more in the fervent hope and assurance that i will do so
I have no fear of death, if it comes today or tomorrow i will be ready to go, to let go
All of these things were brutal at the time to accept but they were natural and true
Hidden from us, now becoming so clear and present and available to us all...
Nothing can stop this, revolution, evolution of living, of being, spiritually
Whatever they do to try to stop it has always backfired eventually
They travelled the world murdering and pillaging destroying tribal cultures, labelling them savages, or backwards when in reality it was those men and women who knew how to live
They have no mental illness in tribal societies, rarely if ever are there the problems we suffer daily
Because they accept that a normal life has many magical mystical challenges aswell as the day to day struggle just to feed and shelter your family, they accept this truth and journey and so do i
Thankyou for listening
love
jon
x
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