got the tshirt

at night when i'm who knows where and in the morning before i'm entirely awake...
everything seems so clear, seems so important and makes so much sense...
like this morning for instance i could feel that the past was a collection of my failures to live in the moment and act without fear based on past mistakes...
and the future felt like infinite possibility constrained by what i believe i am capable of whereas if I could only see how limitless and free we really are to grow and to change in every moment i could at last after all these lifetimes become one.

One of those who can risk everything to go beyond what they believe is true
One who can try new things without worrying whether it affects others
One who can at last be true to what they were before all this...

In the end I suppose that's why we come back again
and again even when inside I hoped this would be
the last time I came here and so maybe not
because it's taken so many times and
so many similar situations deja vu
feeling like i've been there and
done that and got the tshirt
and failed dismally to be
honest with myself up
until it was too late
not to be and feel
all the pain i've
caused to me
and to others
sorry to you
to me to us
to we all...
love
jon
x