let us see

i call on the infinite unconditional energy, of every moment that was, is, will be
and i humbly ask it to flow through me, to fill me up, to fill my cup, to send it
on back out into the worlds we can't and those we can see, because in
these modern times we don't believe that they or this energy exists
and so for us this failure persists and well, so, just like magic
if you can't accept that it's real then it isn't a possibility
and i know you have no reason yet to trust me but
one day when we're together well then maybe
we'll both dare to open our hearts and see

higher self

so my mind, my imagination has now a valued added extra
it's a voice, no not a voice, more like a stream of thoughts
and they're coming from my heart and not from my head
so as i follow them, wherever they are leading me on
i realise that it's changing me inside for the better
in ways that i've resisted for so long and now
they're telling me to relax, go with the flow
stop trying to control the way things go
stop imagining the future till it's here
stop worrying so much, or fearing
when i do see what comes near
experience life the right way
work hard, get clean, go
out maybe and play
see another day
come and go
not killing
time no
more
x

beat

and i'm off again to walk the beat
pound concrete floors for the elite
stop folks from stealing owt to eat
a thing to sell, so they can, survive
to fund a habit, cos they're deprived
no real joy left in their shattered lives
and on it goes and on so do i to earn
weary, aching, but trying, just to learn
an old lesson one last time, cos i yearn
to leave this rigmarole behind, to thrive
reconnect with nature and feel truly alive

eye of the storm

as soon as you realise you are suffering, not enjoying a moment in time
accept it, don't fight it, you don't have to like it but don't stress out bro
or sis, see it for what it is, it's just an instant in a life, no more strife
no more struggling, just let it be, breathe in calmly and back out
there's no need to shout, whether it's traffic or you feel stuck
ignore the temptation to give a fuck, relax into whatever is
there's more to life than this, don't become so frustrated
because soon you'll feel elated and when you do well
you start to see that both are just impostors really
the same thing nearly, in the middle it's clearly
a battle you don't need to win or even fight x

flocking behaviour suggest a predator in the environment

a silent war in raging inside of me between who i was, am and would like to be
it feels like an age old quest for the holy grail, the final war between win and fail
as time goes on it's less one sided and more like two, two wolves to be fed who
feed off situations where patterns and habits, or old behaviours breed like rabbits
my instant reaction to choices begins one way, not the other as i make my play
prevailing winds were set to come from 1 direction, now stifling desired erection
creating an inner turmoil showing me up and once and for all which way to go
there's no going back, only onwards and upwards, yes, as above, so below
i could go on as i have in many lives past mistakes or put on the brakes
to change the route, change the pace, slow down and face the haste
that speeds us from here to there readily, so eagerly, so unsteadily
yes i get the feeling that this is all both deadly serious and a joke
needing to listen to the voice that sticks a stick into the spokes
can brake the bike we're riding before we land onto the spikes
halt the progress, turn us about face, head home not away
learn to trust that inner knowing that at first sounds like
a nagging inner critic, only this one is in our hearts
it keeps on telling me not to do all those things
that i might have enjoyed that were empty
of any real substance, or any real joy
i worried it was teasing or a ploy
but i have to admit that i feel
much better, that it's real
i think it's the real me
trying to be heard
and to herd me
shepherd me
back into
a flock
love
x

death duty

since i started waking up personally and to just how fucked the world is i've been struggling with the jobs i've been doing or not, since i've also struggled with working and knowing day by day that im basically making rich people richer and helping them destroy the planet that we live on, searching for an ethical employment option i've ended up working as a security guard for argh i can barely say it, it ends with escos and starts with a t, for what a tit i feel like right now, but as a short term option and like the abbatoir i was working in for a few days, this is going to be a sure fire way of making me really realise and accept that this just can't go on, for most people they don't care, and ignorance is bliss for them, for me this is torture...
I know friends who say with their house and mortgage (mort means death) and bills they have to work for the insurance company or whoever it is they work for, at the moment and their dream of course is to get out and live free, so that's my long term plan, once i've paid off a ccj and a years back rent and a few other things... :( x

what the actual f is going on?

what we say and do comes from our own point of view, that's obviously true
but i wondered what would happen if we all remembered our connection to
one another, to the world at large, to have a new and expanded worldview
maybe then we could all decide to do what's right for each and everyone
instead of short term choices that work for the few far more than many
to shape the world around us in a good way that makes more sense
take into account our short lifespan yes but also the worlds long one
after all even though our lives are getting longer are they better for us?
are things getting better for the majority of the animals, the plants, life?
until the answer to most of these concerns is yes all we can do is admit
things aren't getting better, they're getting worse most of our lives are shit
that don't need to be the case though we can be the solution not a problem
step outside of the narrow lines and posted signs and listen to your heart <3

this is being human

when i first heard of energy healers i was sceptical, i even took up an offer to receive some healing from a distance and i have to say i didn't feel anything but then over time and the course of the experiences i've been through and the motions i went through that the music i listened to made me feel like doing it came to me and then last week i went to planet shroom and lost my inhibitions and danced and gave people energy as i usually would and one lad was gobsmacked, he said he felt it, and so we went off to talk about the experience that he'd just had, and later he commented that it was the most profound experience of his life so that was amazingly life affirming, beautiful to behold, a justification of everything i've been doing and pure proof that i need to continue, to give this energy away, to let it do it's job, find its place, in time and space, let it flow, let myself go, be the love i wish to see in the world, let others know, that it's out there, waiting for us to reconnect to what was lost when our rational pendulum swing away from feeling to thinking tore out our very loving nature, made us into the unreasonable reasoning beings that we are now instead of the feeling beings we were always meant to be and so despite my ill health at the moment, and the debt i've gotten myself trapped by, that i can't seem to let go of the past that holds me back, my fears and all the rest of the shit i struggle to deal with, this IS true, this IS right, this IS love, this IS being human x

believe in better

what we think is one thing, close to the surface, but deeper in our mind, are our beliefs and those are harder to change because we need to constantly update them, be willing to see what we really feel about things, be open to change.
Energy for instance, it's taken years of meditation and an open mind to start to feel energy, it's all around us, waiting for us to connect with it, in a form that can take any shape, become anything, love, hate, courage, fear, it's up to us to accept.
Through breathing exercises, visualisations of our body as a container that can be filled with a loving healing light, seeing that raining down on us, slowly filling us up from the ground, working up through our body until it reaches our crown, breathing it in, letting it work wherever it is needed, letting darker things rise up like the skin on a rice pudding until it bursts from our crown to be replaced by the unconditional love that the universe is made of that can become anything, pretending until it's real xxxxx

earworms

earworms, mental parasites, bred by someone singing something catchy, catching them and passing them on, hearing the same few lines of a song, what is that? Where did it come from? Oh my days I hadn't heard that in while, what is that? Bring it back, the conciousness to a blank, let it go, listen to it again or no x

porridge

mmmm porridge with blackcurrent jam in it innit :) x <3 thought it was about time i just did a standard status as it's been a while since they were anything other than prosey poetry type stuff and then it comes into my mind that i ought to write about Eden, or to use it's proper name the garden of need, where we get what we need not want, where we love each other, all life, the animals and the world and get that back without trying to find it, eden is a state of mind, i've been there before, a friend called changa took me there, or took me past my inability to see that we are already there, just blinded to it because of our distant past, everything looked the same only pretty perfect and the beech trees look kind of alien but cool as f*ck, all our possessions look like toys or fake, the cradle of humanity is just a kindergarten for us to learn from and to get there again all we need to do is love, what we do, who we're with, who we really are and let go of our distractions, our failure to see the shadow that is cast when we only care about ourselves and my feeling is that we are all on our way back, sooner rather than later if we can just be the love that we seek x