sleepy head

all fossil fuels are our ancestors and we cremate them in our vehicles to
come and go as we please and so we are literally burning our bridges
and failing to acknowledge what we owe generations of creatures
that came before us so that we are living now and able to ruin
the natural world that is not my point in writing this one no
it's to say something to the living not to the already
dead, to those who may die soon or later isn't
that our only certainty in life truly after all?
The countdown has begun and i hope
that we've started to see the rope
we gave ourselves enough
to hang ourselves all
with and we were
swinging just
gasping
into
it

We don't go to sleep when we're tired and have been yawning
because we know deep down subconsciously that we ought to
we know that sleep is the best thing for us and will bring us to
a better place, of healing, revealing where we are going off
the beaten path, the one the ancestors trod for us all long
long ago, we know, we stay up late, watching screens, to
find something to do instead of sleep to not go straight
we take things, smoke things, drink things and i did it
i ignored the signs, all the times, the ignorance well
it was not bliss, it was, unconsciousness, and it fit
it fit me then because i couldn't see how it could
be any better to try to be understood, be real
to feel something again because the pain it
felt better to be there rather than here so
i know the reasons and the symptoms
and the excuses and the currently
emphatic unsympathetic attitude
i had to my own self be untrue
it's just i think we're all in this
state of post war traumatic
stress disorder generally
a generation which lead
to a disingenuousness
to lie to ourselves not
cope and not see it
because it's easier
to ignore what's in
front of your face
it's our reflection
looking back in
to our contact
lenses within
our eyes so
wide open
refusing
truth to
sleep
on
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The answer for me was to go outside when i didn't feel like it
and yet i knew it was the right thing to do at the same time.
The answer was to go to sleep as soon as i was yawning
because the natural rhythms tell us what is right for us.
The answer for me was to know that I could do worse
I could choose to keep on doing what i was doing
or i could make the sane choice try something
outside my comfort zone that was so small
choose to accept i can't change the past
i can make a difference in my own life
i can do something with it and see
i can i can i can just change it
change internal statements
from i can't to i can then
check what happens
next like connect
four will i win
or lose all
i cared
again
love
jon
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