A Brief Herstory of my Time

A Brief Herstory of my Time

Yow i
Nearly three years old saw my sister coming out of Hospital
Grew up in the most idyllic spot I know apart from Bridport
Saw ghosts, ufos, felt and played with tantric energy, I lived
Entered the workplace, watched my connection to all wither
Yet throughout was gasping in spells, seeking help to breath
Finally I drowned myself in a different nothingness of a kind
Away and a Way was sought found cultivated and harvested
From deaths door I revolved resolved towards the otherone
Let me clear my name and my debts, do what you will, after
That was three years ago or there abouts. I haven't stopped
Yet i

The process of dying while alive is a necessary one thatall human beings need to undertake, that being the operative word here. A metaphorical death which seems nonetheless real at the time, does not kill you it makes you stronger and was the origin of the term...

I had to close my eyes and put my head onto the pillow knowing (at the time at least) that I was about to die and it was my own voice saying "ha ha you can't even contact your friends cos your phone isn't here so just lay down and it will all be over soon"... Taunting me tempting me to stay up and make myself ill or cry myself to sleep and just let go...

I let go... I'd had the vague instinct that I would die every night if and when I actually dropped off (this mortal coil... temporarily as we do when travelling to the realm of the spirit / underworld / undead / netherworld / you name it ) as we sleep.

Woke up the next day with a far greater feeling of lightness of being, so much baggage gone over the last few years of self examination on all scales... Everything happens on all scales of a fractal landscape... Our existence even without proof of a fractal nature behind it (although I doubt it will be long coming if it isn't here already) shows signs of similarity over smaller and larger scales. Any positive change that I make but most of all importance, consistently... over time has a far larger cumulative effect. I finally get so many things that were tough if not impossible.

Stereograms
I can drive and talk at the same time
multi tasking far easier than it was before gradually
focus is an issue as many things can be calling for my attention at once

Over time as I use my imagination to explore these new landscapes and jungle environments, although I find many ruined temples and structures there are so many little places of value that I can't help seeking them even if they are the hardest ones furthest off the beaten track.

The truth is coming out about everything and about time too ;)

shaman of the world unite & untie

Light & Love
Jon
x
I tried to write an account of the lastfew weeks and months just nicely but it's all turning into poetry prose verse ryhme and nonsense type crap at the moment, as hard as I try to be normal and justwrite my feeling it comes out as an attempt to compare contrast or otherwise explain away what ive been going through... It's the transformation into human being right and proper.

Instinctive
Emotional
Emphatic
Creative
Physical
Sensual
Hungry
Loving
Messy
Harsh
Strict
Cruel
Sexy
NATURAL ANIMAL

professionalism this year frugalism next.. next stop utopia planetia then?genesis revelation holiday i need one badly have you seen my hands lately?

thawt i saw mohammed al fayed in a garage near chard earlier,it wasn't but it gave me an excuse to talk to the very man who knew exactly where I wanted to go to get back exactly on time 3:13 - 3:14 good job too cos she had tomake hair appointment.. justin mate this last three days have been epic in all the ways you now know about... the nextfew weeks will be trying,but even when you can't see it shining on you it certainly is just diffusely, the sun is our day and the moon our night and finally i have the peace of mind to accept all dichotomoy... having been to both extremes good and then bad and then good again I can honestly say that we are definitely half awake no longer asleep... if i can realise that,any one can x (sorry i hijack the profiles of people who inspire me and I antagonise until people open up to me so that I can be st agoni ant.. the patron saint of all idiots and geniuses like myself... photos on my profile to follow of my palms, didnt get them checked read felt up cos i was worried what i would find... the truth is it wasn'tall gud but it was close enough to be worth the risky journey to hell and heaven and back to haven... we ARE worth IT <3
apparently showing your appreciation for the world let alone the people you actually know in it, innit, is a far cry from the truth of who we are? I say I love you as easily as fuck you... there's nothing wrong with extremes as long as you have somewhere to retreat to that centers those after short sprints... we move faster than light... as light beings it would be daft if we couldnt otherwise we would stand still... The year is 3001 and soon will be again as we catchup to where we left off when a symbiosis occurred with an organism that promised the truth the light and the way but instead decided to infect us with it's own mental aberations.. the serpent has been tamed because it offered what it said it did but was disingenuous when it came to carrying out its promise... That is why I don't make many and ALWAYS do what I say I will say what I mean do what i say if I can... so don't follow anyone set your own example... you will know me long enough to remember everything, Everything, EVERY THING and then forget I ever existed.. The same fate that you will find is necessary for us to live in higher realms at a later date and time where we will want ANON IMITY from who we are so thatwe can guiltessly enjoy our favourite poisons and pleasures in peace... Hell's just a hair of the dog's breath away as the wolf approaches again... this time we are more than ready... 12 of the cycles through two more to go at top speed back to ultimate unity... as for now.. revolution and awakening soon as possible please you fuckwits and then (always thank someone when you insult them and make the word nicer than the fuck off was so that they weigh the first insult with the second compliment and find they cannot accept the one without the other that absolves me of any guilt.. the rest if their problem and they see it now so clearly don't you all of the people all of the time? Love You Thankyou for anything you ever did for me ever whether you knew me or not I saved you you saved us bygones peeps let's get together... most companies are pretending to be good but that's the first step to being there and living there and dying there and then instantly being reborn.. not painful at all never as bad as you think our fear is merely a painful memory an echo growing quiet of past necessary evil to get to where we are now in our own experiement to create a future world where everyone and thing is preserved and able to follow it's own indivisual indivisual paths... I'm on it... so on it... you are too... see you soon xx but not if I see you first us autistics cant handle eye contact until we too reliase that we're more fucked up so that when we finally talk ourselves out of it... we're some of the best people you've ever met that have multiple personalities and are eccentric beyond belief.. fun to be with though aren't they? that's you that is? <3 if i ask it in the form of a question it will still be an answer to jeopardy but not such a big sounding risk... maybe the phat lady mother nuture will finally whisper us a lullaby into out retirement wherever and whatever that looks like cos I still don't really know despite the phenomenal power I only see an itty bitty living space... Horton here's a Who? US only in smaller form sooooo inner space... miniaturisation DOES work cos we invented it, time travel? of sorts you make a decision in the present that sends shockwaves or ripples back and forth through your own timeline changing your parallel universe into a nightmare nightmate when it should be a happy drama dream... <3 Happy endings all around don't forget to forget who i am unless i'm not wearing my disguise, otherwise just do as I say and get in line i wanna see what everything else is like this place has gotten stuck in a rut, boring but actually scotlands really nice i think i'll start there or cambodia / vietnam / laos ive heard good things and no longer fear a..... thing or anyone.. look into my eyes not around them into them and then snap you're back in the room wondering why you're stood doing the I feel ike chicken tonight chicken tonight pose with a giant golden egg exposed coming out of your.... puck says hi bye love ya wudnt wanna be ya XXX ;)


the closer you get to death the more you realise that you don't fear it any more we call that acceptance of our fate it certainly is unless we change our spots as leopards and our ways as cheetahs... both usually monogamous but can stray like any cool predatory cat can... hmmm cat from red dwarf what if we were to continue evolving and gentically altering ourselves to use even more capacity within thatsystem of unique possibilites? i guess the answer are endless and extraordinary or very verysimple they usually are aren't they?

MAY THE Light AND LOVE OF eNLIGHTENMENT absolve you of your so called sins, it's only a game don't take it so seriously. games are getting so good these days it's almost indistinguishable from the real thing.. oh yeah funny that... we dream at night of a fabulous life and then wake up every day to this... i see haven and live there it's like the holiday camp, exciting full of surprises always and you get free advertising for whatever it is that you create by spreading word of mouth or entertaining everybody, living is easy living is fun living is not a channel it's a signal of hope spread throughout the universe as the spores of mushrooms once the eggs of a dying race of space creatures whose lastbesthope was to have a child who may or may not be king or queen only problem theyre ego maniacs unless they getthe right dicipline. they're own

be independent but know atthe same time and space that you need every one there too...

or its just no fun anymore is it?

see ya there i mean here i mean here and there...

Light n Love and professionalism for once

Jon Paul Walker esquire and friends and lovers

xxx

peace out my sisters and brothers as my friend desmond hume would say, i was LOST only three days ago myself.. see ya in another life..... soon...sunnhy afternoon shame to waste it... <3

wasnt mohammed al fayed at all was justa very nice english gentle man with a rough wether worn exterior... we are eternals no not that band, we live forever in the light and grace of our parents whose memory we keep living on in our hearts minds souls and spirits... you CAN please all of the people ALL of the time but only if they're ALL atleast half awake, listening and willing to get off they're arses and vote with their feet and hands and eyes and other stuff like wings etc <3